"I'm tired of being misunderstood. I will open my heart. I want to tell it like it is."
When the 42-year-old R&B star R Kelly announced last week that he was planning to write his memoirs, it made headlines around the world. While it's hardly unusual for a musician to pen an autobiography - or at least, have one penned for them - R Kelly's promises to be juicier than most.
The R&B star, who was acquitted last year of 14 charges of child pornography, promised he would be writing at length about the six-year legal ordeal that, his publishers say, almost ruined his life.
As well as detailing his acquittal, the book will also cover the death of his mother, how he wrote famous songs including the Michael Jackson hit You Are Not Alone and his annulled marriage to the R&B star Aaliyah. She was 15 when they wed in 1994. The then 27-year-old Kelly had met her while working on her debut album, Age Ain't Nuthin' But a Number.
Kelly's memoir will be published in 2011 by Smiley Books, an imprint owned by the radio talk show host Tavis Smiley, and will be co-written by David Ritz, who has worked on books with Aretha Franklin and Marvin Gaye.
While no one is doubting Robert Sylvester Kelly's musical credentials - "Even a routine R Kelly track outshines much of the competition," said The New York Times, reviewing his latest CD, Untitled, last month - can he cut it as a memoirist? Will he discuss his arrest after his 1996 brawl outside a health club or the claims against him of false imprisonment by his former employee Henry Vaughan? Will he open up about the repeated rumours concerning his personal life? Will the book be any good?
According to the editor of Q magazine, Paul Rees, the answer is a definite yes. R Kelly's life has all the elements essential to a good rock 'n' roll memoir and in this instance it turns out that rock 'n' roll cliché is the readers' friend.
"Rock 'n' roll lives should read like the bawdiest fictions," says Rees, "including a surfeit of generally monstrous behaviour with the odd near-death experience thrown in. More than one trip to rehab and a resultant terrible back slide into old ways also drives momentum. Falling out terribly with former colleagues and using the book to put one over on them, even decades on, can only be an enhancement."
The best rock 'n' roll memoirs, says Rees, include Mötley Crüe's The Dirt ("The truth may be more unpalatable than this fabulously entertaining story," he says), Bob Geldof's Is That It (especially good on his early years in The Boomtown Rats), Take It Like a Man by Boy George ("unblinkingly honest," said The Guardian in its review) and I'll Sleep When I'm Dead, the unsparing portrait of the alcoholic songwriter and performer Warren Zevron by his ex-wife. Rolling Stone called it "one of the most unflinching examinations of the rock 'n' roll life ever".
This has been a vintage year for the rock memoir. Bob Dylan finally published Chronicles, his idiosyncratic recollection on being a spokesman for a generation, and Mackenzie Phillips dropped a bombshell when she revealed in her autobiography, High on Arrival, that she endured a 10-year incestuous affair with her father, John Phillips, of the Mamas and the Papas.
In those two instances, the stars penned the titles themselves and, despite its rough edges, the prose is all part of the package. But, says Rees, books such as the Blur bassist Alex James's elegant, self-penned memoir, Bit of a Blur, are very much the rock 'n' roll exception rather than the rule.
"Most pop stars have faltering memories and the attention spans of goldfish," he says. "The chances that they would research anything - including their own life - and spend months putting it into a coherent order are slim indeed."
But if they don't write them and can barely recall many of the events within them, why do so many pop stars - everyone from Rick Wakeman to Ray Davies - publish memoirs at all?
"If not for the money, then the king-size egos that allow them to do what they do is usually a clincher," says Rees. "Since many spend most of their time talking about themselves, it's a natural progression."
R Kelly has an advantage: there's no shortage of material to work from. But, says Rees, that is not always a guarantee of a thumping good read. The Rolling Stone Bill Wyman's 1991 memoir, Stone Alone, is for Rees the worst rock memoir ever written. "It promised much and delivered little," he says. "He was forever on the outside looking in."
Not a problem for R Kelly, one would imagine.
The specs
Engine: 4.0-litre flat-six
Torque: 450Nm at 6,100rpm
Transmission: 7-speed PDK auto or 6-speed manual
Fuel economy, combined: 13.8L/100km
On sale: Available to order now
THE SPECS
Engine: 6.75-litre twin-turbocharged V12 petrol engine
Power: 420kW
Torque: 780Nm
Transmission: 8-speed automatic
Price: From Dh1,350,000
On sale: Available for preorder now
So what is Spicy Chickenjoy?
Just as McDonald’s has the Big Mac, Jollibee has Spicy Chickenjoy – a piece of fried chicken that’s crispy and spicy on the outside and comes with a side of spaghetti, all covered in tomato sauce and topped with sausage slices and ground beef. It sounds like a recipe that a child would come up with, but perhaps that’s the point – a flavourbomb combination of cheap comfort foods. Chickenjoy is Jollibee’s best-selling product in every country in which it has a presence.
IPL 2018 FINAL
Sunrisers Hyderabad 178-6 (20 ovs)
Chennai Super Kings 181-2 (18.3 ovs)
Chennai win by eight wickets
The specs
Engine: 1.5-litre turbo
Power: 181hp
Torque: 230Nm
Transmission: 6-speed automatic
Starting price: Dh79,000
On sale: Now
Kanguva
Director: Siva
Stars: Suriya, Bobby Deol, Disha Patani, Yogi Babu, Redin Kingsley
Tips for job-seekers
- Do not submit your application through the Easy Apply button on LinkedIn. Employers receive between 600 and 800 replies for each job advert on the platform. If you are the right fit for a job, connect to a relevant person in the company on LinkedIn and send them a direct message.
- Make sure you are an exact fit for the job advertised. If you are an HR manager with five years’ experience in retail and the job requires a similar candidate with five years’ experience in consumer, you should apply. But if you have no experience in HR, do not apply for the job.
David Mackenzie, founder of recruitment agency Mackenzie Jones Middle East
Results
3pm: Maiden Dh165,000 (Dirt) 1,400m, Winner: Lancienegaboulevard, Adrie de Vries (jockey), Fawzi Nass (trainer).
3.35pm: Maiden Dh165,000 (Turf) 1,600m, Winner: Al Mukhtar Star, Adrie de Vries, Fawzi Nass.
4.10pm: Handicap Dh165,000 (D) 2,000m, Winner: Gundogdu, Xavier Ziani, Salem bin Ghadayer.
4.45pm: Handicap Dh185,000 (T) 1,200m, Winner: Speedy Move, Sean Kirrane, Satish Seemar.
5.20pm: Handicap Dh185,000 (D) 1,600m, Winner: Moqarrar, Dane O’Neill, Erwan Charpy.
5.55pm: Handicap Dh175,000 (T) 1,800m, Winner: Dolman, Richard Mullen, Satish Seemar.
Mercer, the investment consulting arm of US services company Marsh & McLennan, expects its wealth division to at least double its assets under management (AUM) in the Middle East as wealth in the region continues to grow despite economic headwinds, a company official said.
Mercer Wealth, which globally has $160 billion in AUM, plans to boost its AUM in the region to $2-$3bn in the next 2-3 years from the present $1bn, said Yasir AbuShaban, a Dubai-based principal with Mercer Wealth.
“Within the next two to three years, we are looking at reaching $2 to $3 billion as a conservative estimate and we do see an opportunity to do so,” said Mr AbuShaban.
Mercer does not directly make investments, but allocates clients’ money they have discretion to, to professional asset managers. They also provide advice to clients.
“We have buying power. We can negotiate on their (client’s) behalf with asset managers to provide them lower fees than they otherwise would have to get on their own,” he added.
Mercer Wealth’s clients include sovereign wealth funds, family offices, and insurance companies among others.
From its office in Dubai, Mercer also looks after Africa, India and Turkey, where they also see opportunity for growth.
Wealth creation in Middle East and Africa (MEA) grew 8.5 per cent to $8.1 trillion last year from $7.5tn in 2015, higher than last year’s global average of 6 per cent and the second-highest growth in a region after Asia-Pacific which grew 9.9 per cent, according to consultancy Boston Consulting Group (BCG). In the region, where wealth grew just 1.9 per cent in 2015 compared with 2014, a pickup in oil prices has helped in wealth generation.
BCG is forecasting MEA wealth will rise to $12tn by 2021, growing at an annual average of 8 per cent.
Drivers of wealth generation in the region will be split evenly between new wealth creation and growth of performance of existing assets, according to BCG.
Another general trend in the region is clients’ looking for a comprehensive approach to investing, according to Mr AbuShaban.
“Institutional investors or some of the families are seeing a slowdown in the available capital they have to invest and in that sense they are looking at optimizing the way they manage their portfolios and making sure they are not investing haphazardly and different parts of their investment are working together,” said Mr AbuShaban.
Some clients also have a higher appetite for risk, given the low interest-rate environment that does not provide enough yield for some institutional investors. These clients are keen to invest in illiquid assets, such as private equity and infrastructure.
“What we have seen is a desire for higher returns in what has been a low-return environment specifically in various fixed income or bonds,” he said.
“In this environment, we have seen a de facto increase in the risk that clients are taking in things like illiquid investments, private equity investments, infrastructure and private debt, those kind of investments were higher illiquidity results in incrementally higher returns.”
The Abu Dhabi Investment Authority, one of the largest sovereign wealth funds, said in its 2016 report that has gradually increased its exposure in direct private equity and private credit transactions, mainly in Asian markets and especially in China and India. The authority’s private equity department focused on structured equities owing to “their defensive characteristics.”
Formula Middle East Calendar (Formula Regional and Formula 4)
Round 1: January 17-19, Yas Marina Circuit – Abu Dhabi
Round 2: January 22-23, Yas Marina Circuit – Abu Dhabi
Round 3: February 7-9, Dubai Autodrome – Dubai
Round 4: February 14-16, Yas Marina Circuit – Abu Dhabi
Round 5: February 25-27, Jeddah Corniche Circuit – Saudi Arabia
Tottenham's 10 biggest transfers (according to transfermarkt.com):
1). Moussa Sissokho - Newcastle United - £30 million (Dh143m): Flop
2). Roberto Soldado - Valencia - £25m: Flop
3). Erik Lamela - Roma - £25m: Jury still out
4). Son Heung-min - Bayer Leverkusen - £25m: Success
5). Darren Bent - Charlton Athletic - £21m: Flop
6). Vincent Janssen - AZ Alkmaar - £18m: Flop
7). David Bentley - Blackburn Rovers - £18m: Flop
8). Luka Modric - Dynamo Zagreb - £17m: Success
9). Paulinho - Corinthians - £16m: Flop
10). Mousa Dembele - Fulham - £16m: Success
Specs
Engine: Electric motor generating 54.2kWh (Cooper SE and Aceman SE), 64.6kW (Countryman All4 SE)
Power: 218hp (Cooper and Aceman), 313hp (Countryman)
Torque: 330Nm (Cooper and Aceman), 494Nm (Countryman)
On sale: Now
Price: From Dh158,000 (Cooper), Dh168,000 (Aceman), Dh132,000 (Countryman)
Where to buy
Limited-edition art prints of The Sofa Series: Sultani can be acquired from Reem El Mutwalli at www.reemelmutwalli.com
England's all-time record goalscorers:
Wayne Rooney 53
Bobby Charlton 49
Gary Lineker 48
Jimmy Greaves 44
Michael Owen 40
Tom Finney 30
Nat Lofthouse 30
Alan Shearer 30
Viv Woodward 29
Frank Lampard 29