Quality time with family needn’t break the bank

The memory of a fraught father swearing and shouting at his son while on a skiing holiday a few months ago has stuck with me. Who knows what led up to it. Unfortunately, this situation is played out many times over during what should be a time for creating magical family memories. But along with testing our levels of tolerance, holidays are also a time when many of us stretch ourselves financially – or at the very least, put a significant sum of money aside for the privilege – money that could be used for other things – thereby adding to already mounting pressure.
Expat parents in the UAE feel the strain of summer especially acutely. Why? Because where they live is often transformed into a ghost-town for the duration, the heat doesn't allow for many activities, and whatever venues are available, like kids' clubs, are quite pricey. Add to this that there is little in the way of support-networks or extended family to pitch in and liven things up.
So the tendency, if possible, is to get out of town as soon as school holidays start, and for as long as possible.
Then comes the pressure to do something 'special'.
Well, it turns out that the most memorable family holidays are camping trips! This according to my questioning every child I come across. This rather unscientific methodology has now been vindicated by a survey conducted in the UK – where a third of 2000 people questioned said the sense of freedom, sleeping with other family members in a tent and learning something new were their top holiday memories.
Now "most memorable" does not necessarily equate to 'best memories' – but there's a lot to be gleaned from this.
The first takeaway is that it's more about quality family time. Togetherness. Chilling and chatting.
Touching base and literally getting to know each other.
The other takeaway for me is remembering the forgotten art of playing. Playing together.
I'm sure that, for many parents, the idea of 'down' time with their children without ipads and various gadgets to provide hours of 'entertainment' sends shivers down their spine. But that smacks more of children being sidelined, not embraced. Personally I'd advocate not carrying the electronic entertainers in the first place. Yes it is doable. You need to be gutsy and make the commitment. Commit to connecting with each other – not just eating up time and crossing off days till the heat lifts and you can go back to your 'normal' life in the UAE. Plus do you know that research has shown that addiction to these electronic devices can change the brain similar to changes due to dependence on drugs or alcohol?
So, to help reduce any possible electronic harm, and bring about family harmony, here's my simple parents' guide to having happy healthy children and relationships with them. They guarantee hours of interaction, with the bonus of fascinating insights into the characters of your little ones, and memories that'll last for ever.
Holiday diaries
These are magical books where your children write about adventures and stick various things in – everything from twigs to plants to flyers from events you've been to or transport you've been on. When there's time for photos to be printed, some go in there too. Pictures are drawn and short stories are written.
Looking back over the books always bring memories flooding back – and bring to life the world through the eyes of your little ones. What a wonderful gift that truly lasts and that is with you throughout your lives.
Playing cards and board games
My son and I spent an hour playing brain quiz on a flight just recently. I am always amazed at how his brain works and discover something new about him just about every time we play.
We also take Uno, Junior Monopoly and other board games - and we are never bored.
Always have an activity book to hand. Or create your own and have a notepad and colouring pens at the ready.
Lego!
I always buy a new book for us to read together on holiday. Plain ole' cards – for games like snap, or magic tricks!
Here's to a holiday where the big money goes on getting there, and where you spend time and effort, not money on entertainment.
Then when you have saved up for major-spend holidays like skiing or diving around the Galapagos Islands, you'll be truly in tune with each other and no nerves will be frayed.
Spending quality time with family away from the stresses and strains of every day life doesn't need to break the bank. But it could break your heart if you look back on life and realise that you spent more time crossing off the hours before your children go to sleep rather than connecting with them.
Nima Abu Wardeh is the founder of the personal finance website www.cashy.me. You can contact her at nima@cashy.me
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