People assume that because I enjoy being in the kitchen, shops such as Lakeland, Williams-Sonoma and Sur La Table must feel like big warehouses where love and candy scream from the shelves. But I don't enjoy navigating through stacks of gadgets, widgets and whatsits I don't need to find the one that I do. I revel in uselessness as much as the next person, but I don't need a contraption doing it for me. There are few conveniences out there that a competent, semi-literate cook can't create on the fly.
I'm a short-fuse femme, and by that, I mean, I love being a girl - I just don't have the patience for it. I'm more worried about running out of mayo than make-up, I have a uniform that I wear daily (by choice) and I hate having things around that I don't use.
I've seen too many jazzily outfitted modern kitchens that were doomed by design to be places where nobody wants to hang out, and their granite-topped islands sparkle deservedly. Meanwhile, some of the most humble kitchens I've seen have exuded warmth and practicality where they lacked in appliances, and many of these have been the source of truly great food. A mission and a hotplate will get you far; a sharp knife and a sturdy skillet will bring you home.
As P T Barnum said: "There's a sucker born every minute." I like to think that some are born and some are made. At the top of my list of devices I've never understood are garlic peelers - silicone tubes that use the force of friction to shed the skins from the cloves - and also garlic presses, which Anthony Bourdain correctly referred to as "abominations" and advised, whatever you do with garlic, "don't put it through a press. I don't know what that junk is that squeezes out of the end of those things, but it ain't garlic".
While it's unfathomable to me that certain devices actually get made and sold, it's not the concept I have a problem with, but the efficacy. I would love to meet someone who regularly uses one of those hand-held milk frothers, a tool whose continued existence I'm convinced can be credited to the compulsive habits of duty-free shopping addicts.
Kitchen cabinet space is valuable real estate. Consider the room and the expense you'd be spared if you realised that a spoon rest is really just a glorified saucer, or that an egg comes equipped with its very own egg separator (it's called an eggshell). As for those stainless steel soap bars that ostensibly eliminate the smell of fish, garlic and onion on your hands, their effect can be mimicked by simply wiping your fingers on anything made of stainless steel. It's the binding of the sulphur compounds on your hands to the steel that deodorises, and not how adorable it is. Try rubbing your hands on your tap or the sink you're using to wash your hands with that fake soap. And if you don't have a stainless sink or any steel utensils on hand, rub a little salt or baking soda on your hands instead. If you don't have those around, then the smell on your hands is the least of your problems.
On the other hand, I really do believe that the world would be a better place without dry pasta measurers, flavour injectors, electric twirling spaghetti forks and pizza scissors that double as serving utensils. Whether it's an avocado slicer or a quesadilla maker, most things you can buy for your kitchen are unnecessary - unless you have no imagination, or, less dramatically, no interest in improvising. The beauty of individuality is that it doesn't need anyone's permission or approval, least of all mine.
I'll openly admit to having a soft spot for a couple of pointless devices, such as cornichon pickles and serrated grapefruit spoons; relics of a bygone era. I don't stick to the uses for which they were intended, which is why they get used. Ditto the ubiquitous melon baller - a handy little thing I've never touched to a melon (the waste!). I'm completely in love with my cherry stoner, which saves me from grinding my teeth down to nubbins while pitting cherries and olives.
I've been given a few items that I liked in theory but never bothered to use - special tongs that squeeze the darkest goodness out of your tea bag, a tiny grater the size of my thumb for grating a whit of fresh ginger, those little pods for poaching individual eggs. So I passed those things along, just as I did with a set of escargot dishes that sat unused for years, which I later realised could have been used to coddle quail eggs. If a day ever arrives when I need to coddle four dozen quail eggs, I may borrow them back.
Nouf Al-Qasimi is an Emirati food analyst who cooks and writes in New Mexico
artslife@thenational.ae
From Zero
Artist: Linkin Park
Label: Warner Records
Number of tracks: 11
Rating: 4/5
UAE currency: the story behind the money in your pockets
UAE currency: the story behind the money in your pockets
The specs
Engine: 1.5-litre 4-cylinder petrol
Power: 154bhp
Torque: 250Nm
Transmission: 7-speed automatic with 8-speed sports option
Price: From Dh79,600
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The five pillars of Islam
Nayanthara: Beyond The Fairy Tale
Starring: Nayanthara, Vignesh Shivan, Radhika Sarathkumar, Nagarjuna Akkineni
Director: Amith Krishnan
Rating: 3.5/5
Mercer, the investment consulting arm of US services company Marsh & McLennan, expects its wealth division to at least double its assets under management (AUM) in the Middle East as wealth in the region continues to grow despite economic headwinds, a company official said.
Mercer Wealth, which globally has $160 billion in AUM, plans to boost its AUM in the region to $2-$3bn in the next 2-3 years from the present $1bn, said Yasir AbuShaban, a Dubai-based principal with Mercer Wealth.
“Within the next two to three years, we are looking at reaching $2 to $3 billion as a conservative estimate and we do see an opportunity to do so,” said Mr AbuShaban.
Mercer does not directly make investments, but allocates clients’ money they have discretion to, to professional asset managers. They also provide advice to clients.
“We have buying power. We can negotiate on their (client’s) behalf with asset managers to provide them lower fees than they otherwise would have to get on their own,” he added.
Mercer Wealth’s clients include sovereign wealth funds, family offices, and insurance companies among others.
From its office in Dubai, Mercer also looks after Africa, India and Turkey, where they also see opportunity for growth.
Wealth creation in Middle East and Africa (MEA) grew 8.5 per cent to $8.1 trillion last year from $7.5tn in 2015, higher than last year’s global average of 6 per cent and the second-highest growth in a region after Asia-Pacific which grew 9.9 per cent, according to consultancy Boston Consulting Group (BCG). In the region, where wealth grew just 1.9 per cent in 2015 compared with 2014, a pickup in oil prices has helped in wealth generation.
BCG is forecasting MEA wealth will rise to $12tn by 2021, growing at an annual average of 8 per cent.
Drivers of wealth generation in the region will be split evenly between new wealth creation and growth of performance of existing assets, according to BCG.
Another general trend in the region is clients’ looking for a comprehensive approach to investing, according to Mr AbuShaban.
“Institutional investors or some of the families are seeing a slowdown in the available capital they have to invest and in that sense they are looking at optimizing the way they manage their portfolios and making sure they are not investing haphazardly and different parts of their investment are working together,” said Mr AbuShaban.
Some clients also have a higher appetite for risk, given the low interest-rate environment that does not provide enough yield for some institutional investors. These clients are keen to invest in illiquid assets, such as private equity and infrastructure.
“What we have seen is a desire for higher returns in what has been a low-return environment specifically in various fixed income or bonds,” he said.
“In this environment, we have seen a de facto increase in the risk that clients are taking in things like illiquid investments, private equity investments, infrastructure and private debt, those kind of investments were higher illiquidity results in incrementally higher returns.”
The Abu Dhabi Investment Authority, one of the largest sovereign wealth funds, said in its 2016 report that has gradually increased its exposure in direct private equity and private credit transactions, mainly in Asian markets and especially in China and India. The authority’s private equity department focused on structured equities owing to “their defensive characteristics.”
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The specs
Engine: 1.5-litre turbo
Power: 181hp
Torque: 230Nm
Transmission: 6-speed automatic
Starting price: Dh79,000
On sale: Now
Match info
Premier League
Manchester United 2 (Martial 30', Lingard 69')
Arsenal 2 (Mustafi 26', Rojo 68' OG)
Electoral College Victory
Trump has so far secured 295 Electoral College votes, according to the Associated Press, exceeding the 270 needed to win. Only Nevada and Arizona remain to be called, and both swing states are leaning Republican. Trump swept all five remaining swing states, North Carolina, Georgia, Pennsylvania, Michigan and Wisconsin, sealing his path to victory and giving him a strong mandate.
Popular Vote Tally
The count is ongoing, but Trump currently leads with nearly 51 per cent of the popular vote to Harris’s 47.6 per cent. Trump has over 72.2 million votes, while Harris trails with approximately 67.4 million.
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Dunki
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Wicked
Director: Jon M Chu
Stars: Cynthia Erivo, Ariana Grande, Jonathan Bailey
COMPANY PROFILE
Founders: Alhaan Ahmed, Alyina Ahmed and Maximo Tettamanzi
Total funding: Self funded