When my son was a baby, I used to sneak into his room at night to watch him sleep. I would rest my hand on his tiny back, and marvel at how perfectly my thumb would fit into the graceful indent at the base of his skull, at just that point where the skull balances on top of the spine. I knew he would grow up because that’s what all the parenting books said, but somehow, there in the dark listening to him breathe, I found it difficult to imagine.
Well, as predicted, that growing-up thing has happened; that spot where my thumb used to fit so perfectly is much bigger now, and were I to attempt such a caress in anything other than the most private of moments, I would get a groan, an eye-roll, and a “mom!” of protest.
The parenting books were right about the growing-up thing, but they neglected a key detail: no one told me about “the driving years”. This period starts about the time your child stops letting you hug him in public and stops (I hope) somewhere around the time he leaves for university.
The driving years sneak up on you: first it’s just the occasional football practice on the weekend; then it’s football and maybe rugby; then it’s football, rugby, art class and a stop at a friend’s house. Before you know it your entire Saturday has been spent behind the wheel of a car.
In Manhattan, where we lived before our children were old enough to publicly transport themselves, teenagers can take a bus or a train almost anywhere they want to go. For those occasions when public transport won’t work, a parent is pressed into action – or a taxi. The traffic in New York is so bad that the possibility of a serious traffic accident is fairly negligible. Here, of course, where even a trip to the grocery store can result in feeling like you’ve stumbled onto the set of Furious 7, a taxi ride seems like a riskier proposition.
The F1-wannabes who zoom around Abu Dhabi’s roads make me anxious about letting “my baby” take cabs. In some odd manifestation of parental protectiveness, I have decided that if my child is going to be in a traffic accident, I want to be at the wheel. I don’t want some unknown taxi or Uber driver to be responsible. I’m not sure my logic entirely makes sense – my teenager thinks I am utterly unreasonable – but so far I’m resisting his pleas that I change my mind.
My son’s adolescence has not only resulted in a lot more driving, it has also forced me to reconsider “the mall”. I am generally not a fan of shopping malls, but the adolescent need to be somewhere that is not home has driven me, as it were, to see malls in a different light. Malls offer a neutral “hangout” space: no parental oversight, no pesky siblings. “Hanging out” seems to be the primary verb of adolescence. I don’t know what it translates to in Arabic, but in my mind, I imagine malls full of rows of teenagers draped like wet laundry hanging out to dry.
I grumble as I drive from mall to mall (the soundtrack of the driving years: teenagers grunting in surly disdain; parents complaining). But then I wonder: What else could they do? There is only so much beach a person can handle before sunburn takes its toll, and Abu Dhabi doesn’t have a “high street” where kids can amble along poking in and out of shops and cafes.
With every new building that breaks ground, I have a moment of hope: an idea lab, maybe, or a media centre with gadgets and studios, perhaps a big library. And I think that maybe when the Saadiyat museums open, maybe the teenagers will decide to hang with the masterpieces, but that doesn’t solve the immediate problem.
Or perhaps these grunting teenagers would concede to hanging out, laundry-like, in the newly designed Mushrif Central Park, now that the weather is starting to cool down?
I wonder how long it will take me to drive there.
Deborah Lindsay Williams is a professor of literature at NYU Abu Dhabi
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Surianah's top five jazz artists
Billie Holliday: for the burn and also the way she told stories.
Thelonius Monk: for his earnestness.
Duke Ellington: for his edge and spirituality.
Louis Armstrong: his legacy is undeniable. He is considered as one of the most revolutionary and influential musicians.
Terence Blanchard: very political - a lot of jazz musicians are making protest music right now.
The Penguin
Starring: Colin Farrell, Cristin Milioti, Rhenzy Feliz
Creator: Lauren LeFranc
Rating: 4/5
The specs
Engine: 2.0-litre 4-cylinder turbo hybrid
Transmission: eight-speed automatic
Power: 390bhp
Torque: 400Nm
Price: Dh340,000 ($92,579
Company%20profile
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DRIVERS' CHAMPIONSHIP STANDINGS
1. Sebastian Vettel (Ferrari) 171 points
2. Lewis Hamilton (Mercedes-GP) 151
3. Valtteri Bottas (Mercedes-GP) 136
4. Daniel Ricciardo (Red Bull Racing) 107
5. Kimi Raikkonen (Ferrari) 83
6. Sergio Perez (Force India) 50
7. Max Verstappen (Red Bull Racing) 45
8. Esteban Ocon (Force India) 39
9. Carlos Sainz (Torro Rosso) 29
10. Felipe Massa (Williams) 22
SPECS
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Tributes from the UAE's personal finance community
• Sebastien Aguilar, who heads SimplyFI.org, a non-profit community where people learn to invest Bogleheads’ style
“It is thanks to Jack Bogle’s work that this community exists and thanks to his work that many investors now get the full benefits of long term, buy and hold stock market investing.
Compared to the industry, investing using the common sense approach of a Boglehead saves a lot in costs and guarantees higher returns than the average actively managed fund over the long term.
From a personal perspective, learning how to invest using Bogle’s approach was a turning point in my life. I quickly realised there was no point chasing returns and paying expensive advisers or platforms. Once money is taken care off, you can work on what truly matters, such as family, relationships or other projects. I owe Jack Bogle for that.”
• Sam Instone, director of financial advisory firm AES International
"Thought to have saved investors over a trillion dollars, Jack Bogle’s ideas truly changed the way the world invests. Shaped by his own personal experiences, his philosophy and basic rules for investors challenged the status quo of a self-interested global industry and eventually prevailed. Loathed by many big companies and commission-driven salespeople, he has transformed the way well-informed investors and professional advisers make decisions."
• Demos Kyprianou, a board member of SimplyFI.org
"Jack Bogle for me was a rebel, a revolutionary who changed the industry and gave the little guy like me, a chance. He was also a mentor who inspired me to take the leap and take control of my own finances."
• Steve Cronin, founder of DeadSimpleSaving.com
"Obsessed with reducing fees, Jack Bogle structured Vanguard to be owned by its clients – that way the priority would be fee minimisation for clients rather than profit maximisation for the company.
His real gift to us has been the ability to invest in the stock market (buy and hold for the long term) rather than be forced to speculate (try to make profits in the shorter term) or even worse have others speculate on our behalf.
Bogle has given countless investors the ability to get on with their life while growing their wealth in the background as fast as possible. The Financial Independence movement would barely exist without this."
• Zach Holz, who blogs about financial independence at The Happiest Teacher
"Jack Bogle was one of the greatest forces for wealth democratisation the world has ever seen. He allowed people a way to be free from the parasitical "financial advisers" whose only real concern are the fat fees they get from selling you over-complicated "products" that have caused millions of people all around the world real harm.”
• Tuan Phan, a board member of SimplyFI.org
"In an industry that’s synonymous with greed, Jack Bogle was a lone wolf, swimming against the tide. When others were incentivised to enrich themselves, he stood by the ‘fiduciary’ standard – something that is badly needed in the financial industry of the UAE."
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BEETLEJUICE BEETLEJUICE
Starring: Winona Ryder, Michael Keaton, Jenny Ortega
Director: Tim Burton
Rating: 3/5
Monday's results
- UAE beat Bahrain by 51 runs
- Qatar beat Maldives by 44 runs
- Saudi Arabia beat Kuwait by seven wickets
KILLING OF QASSEM SULEIMANI
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COMPANY%20PROFILE
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Results
1. New Zealand Daniel Meech – Fine (name of horse), Richard Gardner – Calisto, Bruce Goodin - Backatorps Danny V, Samantha McIntosh – Check In. Team total First round: 200.22; Second round: 201.75 – Penalties 12 (jump-off 40.16 seconds) Prize €64,000
2. Ireland Cameron Hanley – Aiyetoro, David Simpson – Keoki, Paul Kennedy – Cartown Danger Mouse, Shane Breen – Laith. Team total 200.25/202.84 – P 12 (jump-off 51.79 – P17) Prize €40,000
3. Italy Luca Maria Moneta – Connery, Luca Coata – Crandessa, Simone Coata – Dardonge, Natale Chiaudani – Almero. Team total 130.82/198.-4 – P20. Prize €32,000
The specs
Engine: 2-litre or 3-litre 4Motion all-wheel-drive Power: 250Nm (2-litre); 340 (3-litre) Torque: 450Nm Transmission: 8-speed automatic Starting price: From Dh212,000 On sale: Now
Company%20Profile
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The Buckingham Murders
Starring: Kareena Kapoor Khan, Ash Tandon, Prabhleen Sandhu
Director: Hansal Mehta
Rating: 4 / 5
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Tu%20Jhoothi%20Main%20Makkaar%20
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Brief scores:
Toss: Nepal, chose to field
UAE 153-6: Shaiman (59), Usman (30); Regmi 2-23
Nepal 132-7: Jora 53 not out; Zahoor 2-17
Result: UAE won by 21 runs
Series: UAE lead 1-0
Israel Palestine on Swedish TV 1958-1989
Director: Goran Hugo Olsson
Rating: 5/5
How to protect yourself when air quality drops
Install an air filter in your home.
Close your windows and turn on the AC.
Shower or bath after being outside.
Wear a face mask.
Stay indoors when conditions are particularly poor.
If driving, turn your engine off when stationary.
COMPANY%20PROFILE
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More on animal trafficking
