Pep Montserrat for The National
Pep Montserrat for The National

Warning: Muslims have a sense of humour and we'll be using it



The last year has been no laughing matter in the Middle East. But its epic events - especially its use of peaceful protest and national unity as resources towards building self-determination - have made the wider world realise that Muslims are not as alien as they might have thought.
Amid the darkest moments, the world also saw another glimpse of the universal humanity of Muslims - through comedy. Reuters reported that before his death, eastern Libya was full of anti-Qaddafi humour. Graffiti showed the colonel in a Superman costume with a dollar sign instead of an "S" on his chest. Another showed him in a dustbin labelled "history". A particularly damning cartoon urged him to "surrender himself to the 'national council of hairdressers'".
It's a secret that needs to be let out: Muslims have a deep-rooted sense of humour and are not afraid to use it.
Let's get these important points out of the way first. I know there are deeply miserable people out there who can't possibly believe what I'm telling them: that Muslims both have and appreciate a sense of humour. Their argument is that Muslims will slap a fatwa on anyone who tries to make a joke or poke fun.
And we will. But only on anyone who makes a truly terrible joke. Substandard comedy, no matter where it comes from, should never be tolerated and deserves every fatwa it gets.
There isn't any place either for dressing up prejudice, aggression or sheer ignorance as comedy. We are all too familiar with those misery-boots types who make barbed cracks, then throw up their hands to say: "What? You can't take a joke?" Comedy is not a clever way to be rude or offensive. We can see straight through that.
In an entirely unscientific poll of friends, tweeps and Facebook fans, I asked what the funniest things were that they had been asked as Muslims. While wearing a pink headscarf one woman was asked: "Why do Muslim women wear black all the time?"
A rather baffling question that is often put to Muslims - who generally belong to quite sociable communities - is: "If you don't drink, how do you meet people?"
And what is one to make of the question: "Is it true that light green is the official colour of Al Qaeda?"
Perhaps my favourite of all time, is: "Now that you're engaged, will you have a forced marriage?"
These questions project such a one-dimensional, stereotypical understanding of Muslims that it is hard not to laugh. But we don't. And that's probably why some people think we are so serious and earnest all the time.
In the face of such questioning, Muslims place upon themselves the onerous burden of answering in the nicest possible way. Also, we're never sure how non-Muslims will respond to humour. I've tried being funny when replying, and mostly the reaction is a blank stare. We like that people want to understand, but forgive us if you catch us suppressing an occasional smirk.
Since 9/11, a crop of young, feisty Muslim comedians have made it onto the scene. This has been accompanied by a growing number of comedy festivals, films, internet videos and blogs. Abu Dhabi last week month hosted an international comedy festival featuring the Lebanese stand-up Nemr Abou Nassar.
In the United States, a group of stand-up comics call themselves "Allah Made Me Funny", comprising a black American, an Arab American and an Asian American. In the UK, acts like Imran Yousuf, an East African Asian, and Shaista Aziz, a British Pakistani, vie for attention. We also have stand-ups such as Riaad Moosa in South Africa.
Slowly but surely we are seeing Muslims depicted on western screens in comedy, rather than just as scary terrorists. Mainstream productions include such films as The Muslims Are Coming!, which follows a Muslim comedy troupe around the American Deep South. The Infidel tells the story of a Muslim who finds out he has Jewish roots while his daughter is being courted by the son of a deeply conservative Muslim family, and Looking For Comedy In The Muslim World follows the actor and comedian Albert Brooks to South Asia. But perhaps the most widely known movie is Four Lions, an acclaimed British comedy about four young Muslim men who plot to carry out a suicide bombing, which was directed by the ever controversial Chris Morris.
In 2010, the American journalist Katie Couric suggested that what her country needed if it were going to normalise its understanding of Muslims was a "Muslim Cosby Show". Her wish may be about to come true as Preacher Moss of Allah Made Me Funny is attempting to pilot such a show, currently titled Here Come The Muhammads. He says that "by making it funny, you make it accessible. People can say: 'You mean I can actually laugh at that?'"
Yes, it's true that Muslims and others can in fact joke about Muslims.
At a preview of Four Lions, I found myself the only Muslim among 30 very serious film critics. While others looked around nervously, I was cackling with laughter (no doubt to their annoyance). The film worked because it showed a deep understanding of Muslim cultures, and the break between expectation and reality, both of which are rich seams of humour. It was intelligent, not offensive.
The film opens with the would-be terrorist cell recording their suicide video. The idiot of the group is centre stage and is being mocked for holding a small gun. "Not a small gun," he protests. "Big hands." Even suicide-video production is subject to the inflated egos common in the media.
Muslim humour and self-deprecation are, of course, not recent phenomena. There must be thousands of tales of Mullah Nasruddin, one of the great entertainer-comedian-wisemen of Muslim history, dating back to the Middle Ages. I particularly like this one: A certain conqueror said to Nasruddin, "Mullah, all the great rulers of the past had honorific titles with the name of God in them. There was, for instance, 'God-Gifted', and 'God-Accepted', and so on. How about some such name for me?" "God Forbid," said Nasruddin.
Comedy also serves different purposes within different Muslim communities. While one group of young comedians is using humour to introduce Muslims to a world apprehensive about their faith, another is using it to point out the challenges of their cultures and politics.
In Saudi Arabia, YouTube comedies address religious and political pressures alongside social observation. On The Fly, for instance, has tackled subjects such as the Egyptian uprising as well as TV coverage of Arabs Got Talent.
The internet allows usually unmentionable subjects to be tackled. A mainstream TV show, Tash Ma Tash uses humour to explore social convention. One particularly controversial episode addressed the cultural taboos around discussing polygamy by having a woman with four husbands.
Such developments are the hidden gems of Muslim cultures today. The most powerful thing about their humour is its universality: while the cultural contexts may vary, they take down human foibles and misadventures in ways that all cultures can connect with.
After all, the funniest jokes are the ones that you see yourself in, and which connect to your own experiences.
So here's a multi-faith one to sign off with. A priest, a rabbi and a mullah walk into a bar. The barman says: "What is this, a joke?"
Shelina Zahra Janmohamed is the author of Love in a Headscarf and writes a blog at www.spirit21.co.uk

Brief scoreline:

Manchester United 0

Manchester City 2

Bernardo Silva 54', Sane 66'

Everton%20Fixtures
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COMPANY%20PROFILE
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Singham Again

Director: Rohit Shetty

Stars: Ajay Devgn, Kareena Kapoor Khan, Ranveer Singh, Akshay Kumar, Tiger Shroff, Deepika Padukone

Rating: 3/5

Shipping%20and%20banking%20
%3Cp%3EThe%20sixth%20sanctions%20package%20will%20also%20see%20European%20insurers%20banned%20from%20covering%20Russian%20shipping%2C%20more%20individuals%20added%20to%20the%20EU's%20sanctions%20list%20and%20Russia's%20Sberbank%20cut%20off%20from%20international%20payments%20system%20Swift.%3C%2Fp%3E%0A
Wenger's Arsenal reign in numbers

1,228 - games at the helm, ahead of Sunday's Premier League fixture against West Ham United.
704 - wins to date as Arsenal manager.
3 - Premier League title wins, the last during an unbeaten Invincibles campaign of 2003/04.
1,549 - goals scored in Premier League matches by Wenger's teams.
10 - major trophies won.
473 - Premier League victories.
7 - FA Cup triumphs, with three of those having come the last four seasons.
151 - Premier League losses.
21 - full seasons in charge.
49 - games unbeaten in the Premier League from May 2003 to October 2004.

COMPANY PROFILE

Company: Bidzi

● Started: 2024

● Founders: Akshay Dosaj and Asif Rashid

● Based: Dubai, UAE

● Industry: M&A

● Funding size: Bootstrapped

● No of employees: Nine

Jigra
Director: Vasan Bala
Starring: Alia Bhatt, Vedang Raina, Manoj Pahwa, Harsh Singh
Rated: 3.5/5
Tree of Hell

Starring: Raed Zeno, Hadi Awada, Dr Mohammad Abdalla

Director: Raed Zeno

Rating: 4/5

Living in...

This article is part of a guide on where to live in the UAE. Our reporters will profile some of the country’s most desirable districts, provide an estimate of rental prices and introduce you to some of the residents who call each area home.

Tiger%20Stripes%20
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What is Folia?

Prince Khaled bin Alwaleed bin Talal's new plant-based menu will launch at Four Seasons hotels in Dubai this November. A desire to cater to people looking for clean, healthy meals beyond green salad is what inspired Prince Khaled and American celebrity chef Matthew Kenney to create Folia. The word means "from the leaves" in Latin, and the exclusive menu offers fine plant-based cuisine across Four Seasons properties in Los Angeles, Bahrain and, soon, Dubai.

Kenney specialises in vegan cuisine and is the founder of Plant Food Wine and 20 other restaurants worldwide. "I’ve always appreciated Matthew’s work," says the Saudi royal. "He has a singular culinary talent and his approach to plant-based dining is prescient and unrivalled. I was a fan of his long before we established our professional relationship."

Folia first launched at The Four Seasons Hotel Los Angeles at Beverly Hills in July 2018. It is available at the poolside Cabana Restaurant and for in-room dining across the property, as well as in its private event space. The food is vibrant and colourful, full of fresh dishes such as the hearts of palm ceviche with California fruit, vegetables and edible flowers; green hearb tacos filled with roasted squash and king oyster barbacoa; and a savoury coconut cream pie with macadamia crust.

In March 2019, the Folia menu reached Gulf shores, as it was introduced at the Four Seasons Hotel Bahrain Bay, where it is served at the Bay View Lounge. Next, on Tuesday, November 1 – also known as World Vegan Day – it will come to the UAE, to the Four Seasons Resort Dubai at Jumeirah Beach and the Four Seasons DIFC, both properties Prince Khaled has spent "considerable time at and love". 

There are also plans to take Folia to several more locations throughout the Middle East and Europe.

While health-conscious diners will be attracted to the concept, Prince Khaled is careful to stress Folia is "not meant for a specific subset of customers. It is meant for everyone who wants a culinary experience without the negative impact that eating out so often comes with."

Married Malala

Malala Yousafzai is enjoying married life, her father said.

The 24-year-old married Pakistan cricket executive Asser Malik last year in a small ceremony in the UK.

Ziauddin Yousafzai told The National his daughter was ‘very happy’ with her husband.

The specs

Engine: 3.8-litre twin-turbo flat-six

Power: 650hp at 6,750rpm

Torque: 800Nm from 2,500-4,000rpm

Transmission: 8-speed dual-clutch auto

Fuel consumption: 11.12L/100km

Price: From Dh796,600

On sale: now

THE SPECS

GMC Sierra Denali 1500

Engine: 6.2-litre V8

Transmission: 10-speed automatic

Power: 420hp

Torque: 623Nm

Price: Dh232,500

COMPANY%20PROFILE%20
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How being social media savvy can improve your well being

Next time when procastinating online remember that you can save thousands on paying for a personal trainer and a gym membership simply by watching YouTube videos and keeping up with the latest health tips and trends.

As social media apps are becoming more and more consumed by health experts and nutritionists who are using it to awareness and encourage patients to engage in physical activity.

Elizabeth Watson, a personal trainer from Stay Fit gym in Abu Dhabi suggests that “individuals can use social media as a means of keeping fit, there are a lot of great exercises you can do and train from experts at home just by watching videos on YouTube”.

Norlyn Torrena, a clinical nutritionist from Burjeel Hospital advises her clients to be more technologically active “most of my clients are so engaged with their phones that I advise them to download applications that offer health related services”.

Torrena said that “most people believe that dieting and keeping fit is boring”.

However, by using social media apps keeping fit means that people are “modern and are kept up to date with the latest heath tips and trends”.

“It can be a guide to a healthy lifestyle and exercise if used in the correct way, so I really encourage my clients to download health applications” said Mrs Torrena.

People can also connect with each other and exchange “tips and notes, it’s extremely healthy and fun”.

Joker: Folie a Deux

Starring: Joaquin Phoenix, Lady Gaga, Brendan Gleeson

Director: Todd Phillips 

Rating: 2/5

Saturday's schedule at the Abu Dhabi Grand Prix

GP3 race, 12:30pm

Formula 1 final practice, 2pm

Formula 1 qualifying, 5pm

Formula 2 race, 6:40pm

Performance: Sam Smith

The specs

Engine: 1.5-litre 4-cylinder petrol

Power: 154bhp

Torque: 250Nm

Transmission: 7-speed automatic with 8-speed sports option 

Price: From Dh79,600

On sale: Now

 

 

How to protect yourself when air quality drops

Install an air filter in your home.

Close your windows and turn on the AC.

Shower or bath after being outside.

Wear a face mask.

Stay indoors when conditions are particularly poor.

If driving, turn your engine off when stationary.

Company%20Profile
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Results

5pm: UAE Martyrs Cup (TB) Conditions Dh90,000 2,200m

Winner: Mudaarab, Jim Crowley (jockey), Erwan Charpy (trainer).

5.30pm: Wathba Stallions Cup (PA) Handicap Dh70,000 1,400m

Winner: Jawal Al Reef, Richard Mullen, Hassan Al Hammadi.

6pm: UAE Matyrs Trophy (PA) Maiden Dh80,000 1,600m

Winner: Salima Al Reef, Jesus Rosales, Abdallah Al Hammadi.

6.30pm: Sheikha Fatima bint Mubarak (IFAHR) Apprentice Championship (PA) Prestige Dh100,000 1,600m

Winner: Bainoona, Ricardo Iacopini, Eric Lemartinel.

7pm: Sheikha Fatima bint Mubarak (IFAHR) Ladies World Championship (PA) Prestige Dh125,000 1,600m

Winner: Assyad, Victoria Larsen, Eric Lemartinel.

8pm: Sheikh Zayed bin Sultan Al Nahyan Jewel Crown (PA) Group 1 Dh5,000,000 1,600m

Winner: Mashhur Al Khalediah, Jean-Bernard Eyquem, Phillip Collington.

Usain Bolt's World Championships record

2007 Osaka

200m Silver

4x100m relay Silver

 

2009 Berlin

100m Gold

200m Gold

4x100m relay Gold

 

2011 Daegu

100m Disqualified in final for false start

200m Gold

4x100m relay Gold

 

2013 Moscow

100m Gold

200m Gold

4x100m relay Gold

 

2015 Beijing

100m Gold

200m Gold

4x100m relay Gold