Road test: 2015 Toyota Land Cruiser VX-R

Discussions at The National HQ about what car really sums up Dubai in the eyes of most people didn't last particularly long. Because for all the supercar obsession and the luxury-barge ownership, one vehicle has always been, and possibly always will be, the king of road and dune: the ubiquitous Toyota Land Cruiser.

Whether bearing down on you in the far outside lane of any motorway you care to mention or traversing the vast empty desert with paying visitors aboard desperate for a bit of adrenalin-pumping dune-bashing, this really is a car for all people – and it’s a staple product for the company that’s been importing it into the UAE in one form or another for 50 years.

But just because something is incredibly popular with the masses, it doesn’t mean it’s actually any good. For evidence, just look at almost any soap opera on British television. So it’s time I took the wheel of this modern desert ship and analysed it in the harsh light of day. Does it deserve to be so successful or do people buy these things almost out of habit, ignoring obvious flaws and defects because it has become such a status symbol?

My test car isn’t the “big one”, being a 4.6L upstart to the range-topping 5.7L behemoth, but it’s perfectly adequate for pretty much any application you care to think of. It’s far from a bargain-basement special, though, being the VX-R version, setting you back a minimum of Dh290,000 – an enormous amount of money that easily makes it the most expensive among its contemporaries from America, for whom size obviously is an issue. As anyone will tell you, though, it isn’t everything.

So the Land Cruiser is expensive, but the list of standard kit is exhaustive, including, according to Toyota’s website, lashings of chrome trim wherever you look. To be honest, Toyota could probably double the Land Cruiser’s price and maintain sales figures, such is its stranglehold on the local market. And the version currently on sale is due a radical overhaul, being a midlife refresh that’s itself three years old.

It’s big and brash to look at – all very imposing, but hardly what you’d call beautiful. Open the door and there’s a vast expanse of creamy leather and fake wood trim to welcome you – it’s no Range Rover when it comes to interior design, but it looks attractive enough and offers plenty of functionality. Toyota has tried its level best to “go posh” with its current Land Cruiser, but there’s no denying its more utilitarian engineering.

And there’s nothing wrong with that, because the Land Cruiser’s toughness of construction is the reason there are so many of them pounding the harsh deserts. They seem to just last and last, evidenced by the ages of some of them still hooning around.

On the road, it’s a capable performer, with plenty of straight-line pace and punchy mid-range acceleration. It’s quiet at cruising speeds and ride comfort is exceptional, almost to luxury Lexus standards, despite its rather crude rear suspension componentry. Tyre roar is minimal – that, too, is a surprise because those boots need to be able to tackle the off-road stuff as well. During cornering, it does roll about a bit, but not ridiculously so, and under hard braking it tends to feel like the nose will start scooping up the tarmac, so acute is its forward lean.

I don’t attempt any off-roading in my time with the Land Cruiser because it’s not really my thing and there’s a rather low lip on the front fascia. If you see these things on the dunes at the weekend, their owners have sensibly stripped the bumpers, giving much greater freedom to get on the gas without damaging the car. But for an accurate impression of how they perform, I suggest you stand on any desert roadside, on any weekend, and watch what these things can do. They’re extraordinarily capable machines.

So my experiences are limited to more urban activities, and here, again, the Land Cruiser hammers home why it’s so popular here. There’s space galore inside, with three rows of seats for seven people – essential for larger families – and those seats are very versatile, meaning you can reposition them for extra leg space on all three rows. With them folded down, luggage and furniture moving space is impressive, too, lending it much in the way of all-round practicality.

But still there’s more to it than even all of that. Toyotas, despite the inconvenience of 5,000km service intervals here, are ultimately reliable. That could well be the reason so many of them are pressed into service in the desert – can you imagine breaking down in the middle of nowhere, with no rescue in sight? It’s unlikely to happen with one of these.

Yes, it’s the king of road and desert, and deservedly so. It’s a reign that’s likely to outlast every single one of us, too.

motoring@thenational.ae