I’ve been called a lot of unsavoury things in my career in public life. When I talk about women asserting themselves I’ve been called a feminazi. I’ve been called a deviant. I’ve even been told that it’s lucky I’m too ugly and covered up for a certain kind of assault. That’s what happens when you speak up as a woman. You are met not with reasoned debate but attack, hatred and outrage.
That's exactly what has been happening to women after the pivotal moment of the #MeToo hashtag.
Finally, we were hearing millions of women's voices about the overwhelming experiences of harassment, in their own words. Finally, the daily experiences of women were being given credence.
Yet over the last few days there's been a turn in the tone of the conversation, where men are starting to dominate the discussion again: what does harassment mean to them? Are men under siege? Is this the end for men? And why are women making such a fuss?
It's an extraordinary turn of events. Could it be that men are feeling left out? With all this talk of #MeToo men want to steer the conversation back to themselves.
After all, we know that despite peddling the myth that women all talk all the time, studies show that men actually dominate the share of conversation. And also that they overestimate the amount of time women talk.
It must also explain why during this unprecedented period where we are finally listening to women talking about a problem that women are uniquely placed to discuss - what women experience - it seems men just can't help themselves but grab time and space to talk about their opinions and how they are suffering.
Me too! Me too! Go the cries, like toddlers who feel they are no longer receiving the attention they deserve. Why can't we be naughty and have tantrums, they scream.
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It is the only explanation for the bizarre responses that are emanating from menfolk. This week, the UK has been rife with men who simply can't seem to understand just how hard it is to be a woman and simply exist. And worse, who think that talking about harassment is actually somehow restricting them.
Just look at some of the examples from the UK and you can see similar responses all around the world.
High profile national male influencers have been saying things that suggest it's all gone too far and anyway, why can't they touch women if they want to?
Some have said, what’s the fuss, it's not a real sex scandal, is it? Except of course for the 50 per cent of the population who are suffering.
Then there's the argument that there are bigger things to worry about. In the UK that means Brexit. As though daily abuse suffered by women is not a big thing.
And then there are the downright bizarre points of view where I can't even begin to understand how someone could make that comparison or draw those conclusions. One government minister suggested a radio interview was equivalent to a sexual assault by Harvey Weinstein. Another leading news columnist explained that if women complain about harassment then they should wear niqabs and are really militant Islamists.
And the best one is this: how should men know how to behave properly?
It's obvious when people feel under threat, they assume others will behave with the lack of values they have been busy inflicting. There's an attempt to keep the platform for themselves when they realise this is going to require change. And that attempt is leading to a lot of squealing - and most of it just crazy nonsense at that. A radio interview is not like rape. Women wanting abuse to stop does not mean men will be crushed. And who over the age of two needs to be told that abusing or hurting other people is something to avoid?
Enough. Stop making #MeToo about men. It’s about women. And the best thing men can do is stop saying ridiculous things and making fools of yourself.
Shelina Zahra Janmohamed is the author of Generation M: Young Muslims Changing the World
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Fight card
1. Bantamweight: Victor Nunes (BRA) v Siyovush Gulmamadov (TJK)
2. Featherweight: Hussein Salim (IRQ) v Shakhriyor Juraev (UZB)
3. Catchweight 80kg: Rashed Dawood (UAE) v Khamza Yamadaev (RUS)
4. Lightweight: Ho Taek-oh (KOR) v Ronald Girones (CUB)
5. Lightweight: Arthur Zaynukov (RUS) v Damien Lapilus (FRA)
6. Bantamweight: Vinicius de Oliveira (BRA) v Furkatbek Yokubov (RUS)
7. Featherweight: Movlid Khaybulaev (RUS) v Zaka Fatullazade (AZE)
8. Flyweight: Shannon Ross (TUR) v Donovon Freelow (USA)
9. Lightweight: Mohammad Yahya (UAE) v Dan Collins (GBR)
10. Catchweight 73kg: Islam Mamedov (RUS) v Martun Mezhulmyan (ARM)
11. Bantamweight World title: Jaures Dea (CAM) v Xavier Alaoui (MAR)
12. Flyweight World title: Manon Fiorot (FRA) v Gabriela Campo (ARG)
Living in...
This article is part of a guide on where to live in the UAE. Our reporters will profile some of the country’s most desirable districts, provide an estimate of rental prices and introduce you to some of the residents who call each area home.
The specs
Engine: 2.4-litre 4-cylinder
Transmission: CVT auto
Power: 181bhp
Torque: 244Nm
Price: Dh122,900
RACE RESULTS
1. Valtteri Bottas (FIN/Mercedes) 1hr 21min 48.527sec
2. Sebastian Vettel (GER/Ferrari) at 0.658sec
3. Daniel Ricciardo (AUS/Red Bull) 6.012
4. Lewis Hamilton (GBR/Mercedes) 7.430
5. Kimi Räikkönen (FIN/Ferrari) 20.370
6. Romain Grosjean (FRA/Haas) 1:13.160
7. Sergio Pérez (MEX/Force India) 1 lap
8. Esteban Ocon (FRA/Force India) 1 lap
9. Felipe Massa (BRA/Williams) 1 lap
10. Lance Stroll (CAN/Williams) 1 lap
11. Jolyon Palmer (GBR/Renault) 1 lap
12. Stoffel Vandoorne (BEL/McLaren) 1 lap
13. Nico Hülkenberg (GER/Renault) 1 lap
14. Pascal Wehrlein (GER/Sauber) 1 lap
15. Marcus Ericsson (SWE/Sauber) 2 laps
16. Daniil Kvyat (RUS/Toro Rosso) 3 laps
Specs
Engine: Electric motor generating 54.2kWh (Cooper SE and Aceman SE), 64.6kW (Countryman All4 SE)
Power: 218hp (Cooper and Aceman), 313hp (Countryman)
Torque: 330Nm (Cooper and Aceman), 494Nm (Countryman)
On sale: Now
Price: From Dh158,000 (Cooper), Dh168,000 (Aceman), Dh132,000 (Countryman)
Company profile
Name: GiftBag.ae
Based: Dubai
Founded: 2011
Number of employees: 4
Sector: E-commerce
Funding: Self-funded to date
Racecard
6.30pm: Mazrat Al Ruwayah Group Two (PA) US$55,000 (Dirt) 1,600m
7.05pm: Meydan Trophy (TB) $100,000 (Turf) 1,900m
7.40pm: Handicap (TB) $135,000 (D) 1,200m
8.15pm: Balanchine Group Two (TB) $250,000 (T) 1,800m
8.50pm: Handicap (TB) $135,000 (T) 1,000m
9.25pm: Firebreak Stakes Group Three (TB) $200,000 (D) 1,600m
10pm: Handicap (TB) $175,000 (T) 2,410m
The National selections: 6.30pm: RM Lam Tara, 7.05pm: Al Mukhtar Star, 7.40pm: Bochart, 8.15pm: Magic Lily, 8.50pm: Roulston Scar, 9.25pm: Quip, 10pm: Jalmoud
FIXTURES
All games 6pm UAE on Sunday:
Arsenal v Watford
Burnley v Brighton
Chelsea v Wolves
Crystal Palace v Tottenham
Everton v Bournemouth
Leicester v Man United
Man City v Norwich
Newcastle v Liverpool
Southampton v Sheffield United
West Ham v Aston Villa
The biog
Name: Abeer Al Bah
Born: 1972
Husband: Emirati lawyer Salem Bin Sahoo, since 1992
Children: Soud, born 1993, lawyer; Obaid, born 1994, deceased; four other boys and one girl, three months old
Education: BA in Elementary Education, worked for five years in a Dubai school
Formula Middle East Calendar (Formula Regional and Formula 4)
Round 1: January 17-19, Yas Marina Circuit – Abu Dhabi
Round 2: January 22-23, Yas Marina Circuit – Abu Dhabi
Round 3: February 7-9, Dubai Autodrome – Dubai
Round 4: February 14-16, Yas Marina Circuit – Abu Dhabi
Round 5: February 25-27, Jeddah Corniche Circuit – Saudi Arabia
BRAZIL%20SQUAD
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RESULT
Leeds United 1 Manchester City 1
Leeds: Rodrigo (59')
Man City: Sterling (17')
Man of the Match: Rodrigo Moreno (Leeds)
The specs
Engine: Dual 180kW and 300kW front and rear motors
Power: 480kW
Torque: 850Nm
Transmission: Single-speed automatic
Price: From Dh359,900 ($98,000)
On sale: Now
Dark Souls: Remastered
Developer: From Software (remaster by QLOC)
Publisher: Namco Bandai
Price: Dh199
'Hocus%20Pocus%202'
%3Cp%3EDirector%3A%20Anne%20Fletcher%3Cbr%3E%3Cbr%3EStars%3A%20Bette%20Midler%2C%20Sarah%20Jessica%20Parker%2C%20Kathy%20Najimy%3Cbr%3E%3Cbr%3ERating%3A%203.5%2F5%3C%2Fp%3E%0A
Safety 'top priority' for rival hyperloop company
The chief operating officer of Hyperloop Transportation Technologies, Andres de Leon, said his company's hyperloop technology is “ready” and safe.
He said the company prioritised safety throughout its development and, last year, Munich Re, one of the world's largest reinsurance companies, announced it was ready to insure their technology.
“Our levitation, propulsion, and vacuum technology have all been developed [...] over several decades and have been deployed and tested at full scale,” he said in a statement to The National.
“Only once the system has been certified and approved will it move people,” he said.
HyperloopTT has begun designing and engineering processes for its Abu Dhabi projects and hopes to break ground soon.
With no delivery date yet announced, Mr de Leon said timelines had to be considered carefully, as government approval, permits, and regulations could create necessary delays.
Meydan race card
6.30pm: Baniyas (PA) Group 2 Dh125,000 (Dirt) 1,400m
7.05pm: Maiden (TB) Dh165,000 (D) 1,200m
7.40pm: Maiden (TB) Dh165,000 (D) 1,400m
8.15pm: Handicap (TB) Dh170,000 (D) 1,900m
8.50pm: Rated Conditions (TB) Dh240,000 (D) 1,600m
9.25pm: Handicap (TB) Dh175,000 (D)1,200m
10pm: Handicap (TB) Dh165,000 (D) 1,400m
MATCH INFO
Juventus 1 (Dybala 45')
Lazio 3 (Alberto 16', Lulic 73', Cataldi 90 4')
Red card: Rodrigo Bentancur (Juventus)
MATCH INFO
Day 2 at Mount Maunganui
England 353
Stokes 91, Denly 74, Southee 4-88
New Zealand 144-4
Williamson 51, S Curran 2-28
Our family matters legal consultant
Name: Hassan Mohsen Elhais
Position: legal consultant with Al Rowaad Advocates and Legal Consultants.
Director: Jon Favreau
Starring: Donald Glover, Seth Rogen, John Oliver
Rating: 2 out of 5 stars
ABU%20DHABI'S%20KEY%20TOURISM%20GOALS%3A%20BY%20THE%20NUMBERS
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ULTRA PROCESSED FOODS
- Carbonated drinks, sweet or savoury packaged snacks, confectionery, mass-produced packaged breads and buns
- margarines and spreads; cookies, biscuits, pastries, cakes, and cake mixes, breakfast cereals, cereal and energy bars;
- energy drinks, milk drinks, fruit yoghurts and fruit drinks, cocoa drinks, meat and chicken extracts and instant sauces
- infant formulas and follow-on milks, health and slimming products such as powdered or fortified meal and dish substitutes,
- many ready-to-heat products including pre-prepared pies and pasta and pizza dishes, poultry and fish nuggets and sticks, sausages, burgers, hot dogs, and other reconstituted meat products, powdered and packaged instant soups, noodles and desserts.
