When the next Star Wars movie is released sometime in December, the actor who plays Luke Skywalker, Mark Hamill, will be 64 years old.
That’s disconcerting to those of us who remember him as a young man on his way with the rebel forces to destroy the Death Star. When I first saw the original Star Wars – and we’re all going to pretend that the dreadful, inexcusably awful more recent episodes were never made – I was a mere sprite myself.
Now, Luke Skywalker and I both have flecks of grey in our beards. Now, in fact, we both have beards. Back when the first film was released, I was barely 11 years old. Growing a beard was a long way off.
Sitting in an airport lounge recently, I watched an advertisement for the latest instalment of The Terminator – it will be the fifth big-screen version of the basic killer-robot-from-the-future story – and I was struck by a realisation.
The new film Terminator Genisys features a new and younger cast of characters. But it also features a lengthy appearance from the original Terminator robot himself, Arnold Schwarzenegger, who will be 68 years old at the end of this month.
That’s a rather old piece of technology, when you really think about it. Most of us won’t keep a phone around if it’s more than a couple of years old. That’s the great thing about technology: it’s utterly disposable and constantly being upgraded.
Not in the universe of the Terminator films, apparently. In that world, for some reason, intelligent beings from a distant technology-controlled future continue to rely on a rather creaky and elderly (and probably bug-filled) Terminator for their terminating needs.
But in the airport lounge along with me, and also watching the advertisement for the new Terminator film, was a young father and his son. At a certain point in the trailer, Arnold Schwarzenegger utters his famous catchphrase: “I’ll be back.” The father and I both laughed aloud happily and exchanged a look. His son looked at the two of us, then back at the television, then back at us. “So, um,” he asked, “that thing he said? ‘I’ll be back?’ Is that, like, a thing?”
For a certain portion of the movie-going audience, catchphrases like “I’ll be back” are just not part of the collective memory. They don’t remember being young when Luke Skywalker was young. For them, all of these action heroes – Mark Hamill, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Sylvester Stallone, Harrison Ford – they’re all old men and they always have been. Put it this way: if you can remember sitting in a cinema watching Harrison Ford running around as Indiana Jones in the first Raiders of the Lost Ark picture, I have some bad news for you. You’re old, too.
The Terminator, though, is nothing if not a resourceful time traveller. Say this for Arnold Schwarzenegger: he knows how to keep his personal brand relevant. Two days after getting demographically disconnected in the airport lounge, I was driving to a meeting in Los Angeles using the navigation app, Waze.
Traffic in southern California is a chaotic and baffling thing, and figuring out the most efficient and least-clogged route to the next meeting often seems like a game of roulette. The Waze app sorts out the quickest and most efficient way to get you to your next stop, and it’s quickly become an obsession among traffic-stressed entertainment industry professionals. You just enter in your destination and the app guides you, with audio commands, through back roads and undiscovered shortcuts.
This time, though, when I plugged in my destination the app asked me a question. Would I like, it asked, to change the voice that gives the directions? How about, it suggested, if the directions were delivered by Arnold Schwarzenegger?
I’m not kidding. You can have the Terminator tell you how to get to your next meeting simply by selecting it on the app.
Of course I immediately selected just that. And it really was like having the Terminator himself – or, I suppose, the former governor of California, depending on which part of Arnold Schwarzenegger’s CV appeals to you the most – order you around town. “Turn left now!” he barked at me. “Stay to the right,” he commanded me. All in that unmistakable Terminator accent. I have to say: I know it’s a cheesy and cheap publicity stunt for the release of the movie, but it’s also really cool.
And it’s also the only way these old guys – who are, let’s face it, getting up there in age – are going to stay relevant and in the public eye.
Once you hit 70, it’s awfully hard to pull off the action hero act. The audience gets younger, the bones get more brittle – the world keeps sending the message that it’s time to retire. But if Arnold’s voice can give you driving directions, why can’t Luke Skywalker’s? Why can’t Harrison Ford’s voice guide you through your online tax preparation? Why isn’t Sylvester Stallone’s voice being used for Google Translate?
The Terminator is right. He will be back. But not in a movie. Next time, he’ll be back in an app.
Rob Long is a writer and producer based in Hollywood
On Twitter: @rcbl
Company profile
Company name: Dharma
Date started: 2018
Founders: Charaf El Mansouri, Nisma Benani, Leah Howe
Based: Abu Dhabi
Sector: TravelTech
Funding stage: Pre-series A
Investors: Convivialite Ventures, BY Partners, Shorooq Partners, L& Ventures, Flat6Labs
COMPANY PROFILE
Name: HyperSpace
Started: 2020
Founders: Alexander Heller, Rama Allen and Desi Gonzalez
Based: Dubai, UAE
Sector: Entertainment
Number of staff: 210
Investment raised: $75 million from investors including Galaxy Interactive, Riyadh Season, Sega Ventures and Apis Venture Partners
Moral education needed in a 'rapidly changing world'
Moral education lessons for young people is needed in a rapidly changing world, the head of the programme said.
Alanood Al Kaabi, head of programmes at the Education Affairs Office of the Crown Price Court - Abu Dhabi, said: "The Crown Price Court is fully behind this initiative and have already seen the curriculum succeed in empowering young people and providing them with the necessary tools to succeed in building the future of the nation at all levels.
"Moral education touches on every aspect and subject that children engage in.
"It is not just limited to science or maths but it is involved in all subjects and it is helping children to adapt to integral moral practises.
"The moral education programme has been designed to develop children holistically in a world being rapidly transformed by technology and globalisation."
APPLE IPAD MINI (A17 PRO)
Display: 21cm Liquid Retina Display, 2266 x 1488, 326ppi, 500 nits
Chip: Apple A17 Pro, 6-core CPU, 5-core GPU, 16-core Neural Engine
Storage: 128/256/512GB
Main camera: 12MP wide, f/1.8, digital zoom up to 5x, Smart HDR 4
Front camera: 12MP ultra-wide, f/2.4, Smart HDR 4, full-HD @ 25/30/60fps
Biometrics: Touch ID, Face ID
Colours: Blue, purple, space grey, starlight
In the box: iPad mini, USB-C cable, 20W USB-C power adapter
Price: From Dh2,099
Joker: Folie a Deux
Starring: Joaquin Phoenix, Lady Gaga, Brendan Gleeson
Director: Todd Phillips
Rating: 2/5
Cricket World Cup League 2
UAE squad
Rahul Chopra (captain), Aayan Afzal Khan, Ali Naseer, Aryansh Sharma, Basil Hameed, Dhruv Parashar, Junaid Siddique, Muhammad Farooq, Muhammad Jawadullah, Muhammad Waseem, Omid Rahman, Rahul Bhatia, Tanish Suri, Vishnu Sukumaran, Vriitya Aravind
Fixtures
Friday, November 1 – Oman v UAE
Sunday, November 3 – UAE v Netherlands
Thursday, November 7 – UAE v Oman
Saturday, November 9 – Netherlands v UAE
The specs
Engine: 77.4kW all-wheel-drive dual motor
Power: 320bhp
Torque: 605Nm
Transmission: Single-speed automatic
Price: From Dh219,000
On sale: Now
The specs
Engine: 2-litre or 3-litre 4Motion all-wheel-drive Power: 250Nm (2-litre); 340 (3-litre) Torque: 450Nm Transmission: 8-speed automatic Starting price: From Dh212,000 On sale: Now
COMPANY%20PROFILE%20
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COMPANY PROFILE
Founders: Alhaan Ahmed, Alyina Ahmed and Maximo Tettamanzi
Total funding: Self funded
Moon Music
Artist: Coldplay
Label: Parlophone/Atlantic
Number of tracks: 10
Rating: 3/5
Points Classification
1. Marcel Kittel (Germany / Quick-Step) 63
2. Arnaud Demare (France / FDJ) 38
3. Andre Greipel (Germany / Lotto) 25
4. Sonny Colbrelli (Italy / Bahrain) 24
5. Mark Cavendish (Britain / Dimension Data) 22
6. Taylor Phinney (U.S. / Cannondale) 21
7. Geraint Thomas (Britain / Team Sky) 20
8. Thomas Boudat (France / Direct Energie) 20
9. Stefan Kueng (Switzerland / BMC Racing) 17
10. Michael Matthews (Australia / Sunweb) 17
Singham Again
Director: Rohit Shetty
Stars: Ajay Devgn, Kareena Kapoor Khan, Ranveer Singh, Akshay Kumar, Tiger Shroff, Deepika Padukone
Rating: 3/5
The more serious side of specialty coffee
While the taste of beans and freshness of roast is paramount to the specialty coffee scene, so is sustainability and workers’ rights.
The bulk of genuine specialty coffee companies aim to improve on these elements in every stage of production via direct relationships with farmers. For instance, Mokha 1450 on Al Wasl Road strives to work predominantly with women-owned and -operated coffee organisations, including female farmers in the Sabree mountains of Yemen.
Because, as the boutique’s owner, Garfield Kerr, points out: “women represent over 90 per cent of the coffee value chain, but are woefully underrepresented in less than 10 per cent of ownership and management throughout the global coffee industry.”
One of the UAE’s largest suppliers of green (meaning not-yet-roasted) beans, Raw Coffee, is a founding member of the Partnership of Gender Equity, which aims to empower female coffee farmers and harvesters.
Also, globally, many companies have found the perfect way to recycle old coffee grounds: they create the perfect fertile soil in which to grow mushrooms.
Company%20profile
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Jigra
Starring: Alia Bhatt, Vedang Raina, Manoj Pahwa, Harsh Singh
Key figures in the life of the fort
Sheikh Dhiyab bin Isa (ruled 1761-1793) Built Qasr Al Hosn as a watchtower to guard over the only freshwater well on Abu Dhabi island.
Sheikh Shakhbut bin Dhiyab (ruled 1793-1816) Expanded the tower into a small fort and transferred his ruling place of residence from Liwa Oasis to the fort on the island.
Sheikh Tahnoon bin Shakhbut (ruled 1818-1833) Expanded Qasr Al Hosn further as Abu Dhabi grew from a small village of palm huts to a town of more than 5,000 inhabitants.
Sheikh Khalifa bin Shakhbut (ruled 1833-1845) Repaired and fortified the fort.
Sheikh Saeed bin Tahnoon (ruled 1845-1855) Turned Qasr Al Hosn into a strong two-storied structure.
Sheikh Zayed bin Khalifa (ruled 1855-1909) Expanded Qasr Al Hosn further to reflect the emirate's increasing prominence.
Sheikh Shakhbut bin Sultan (ruled 1928-1966) Renovated and enlarged Qasr Al Hosn, adding a decorative arch and two new villas.
Sheikh Zayed bin Sultan (ruled 1966-2004) Moved the royal residence to Al Manhal palace and kept his diwan at Qasr Al Hosn.
Sources: Jayanti Maitra, www.adach.ae
Bridgerton%20season%20three%20-%20part%20one
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FIXTURES
Monday, January 28
Iran v Japan, Hazza bin Zayed Stadium (6pm)
Tuesday, January 29
UAEv Qatar, Mohamed Bin Zayed Stadium (6pm)
Friday, February 1
Final, Zayed Sports City Stadium (6pm)
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