It would be utterly grotesque if the Barcelona president Joan Laporta ponders picking up a pistol any time soon, and pointing it at Josep Guardiola's head, but one would understand why his trigger finger may get a little twitchy. At such straining outposts, funny results can do funny things to the mind.
The statistics will tell you that the 1-1 draw with Racing Santander at the Nou Camp on Saturday provides Barcelona with their worst start to a league season in 35 years. It leaves them with one point from a possible six after losing at Numancia.
Football obeys no law of logic, and that can be scarily true in Barcelona.
Frank Rijkaard broke with tradition in seeing out five years as Barcelona coach, a lifetime in such a club's years, but Carles Rexach, Louis Van Gaal and Radomir Antic survived only a short period of months before being ousted before Rijkaard's elevation to the post. At the outset of the Spanish season and Barcelona's noble bid to reclaim a national title won twice by Real Madrid over the past two years, the Catalan club find themselves marooned on the starting line.
If they become further isolated in forthcoming weeks, the mayhem that will drift over the Nou Camp may force Laporta to start seeking out bodies to toss overboard and lighten the burden. Invariably, he will look to Guardiola to begin to justify his role as the club's head coach.
At such times, Guardiola's lack of experience, this is his first senior remit, and exposure as a mainstream manager must count against him. It has not reached the stage of dismissals yet, but the locals do not take well to failing at home. The France striker Thierry Henry was omitted from Barcelona's team, but they appeared destined to revel in the warmth of three points.
The Argentina striker Lionel Messi came on as a substitute to score a penalty with 19 minutes remaining, but within six minutes the visiting side restored parity when Jonathan Pereira scored.
A stoical Laporta is supportive of his coach.
"This is the path to follow. With this intensity, which we haven't seen for some time, and the quality that we have," said Laporta.
"We've not been able to do it this time, but another day we will, because playing with this intensity the goals have to come."
Guardiola is optimistic life will improve. "I wouldn't criticise my players for anything because they have been better," he said.
"I'm very happy with the attitude of the players. I know the draw is bad, but I don't have anything more to lament than the result."
Sevilla recovered from 2-0 down to beat Sporting Gijon to move top of La Liga after an impressive 4-3 home win.
Newly promoted Sporting raced into a two-goal lead after just 20 minutes but a Frederic Kanoute double and goals from Ernesto Chevanton and Enzo Maresca cancelled out Mate Bilic's hat-trick.
Atletico Madrid's bright start to the season came to an end as they lost 2-1 to a Real Valladolid side reduced to 10 men.
Angel Vivar Dorado and a Javier Baraja penalty hoisted Vallodolid two goals clear after the opening 30 minutes with Sergio Aguero scoring at after half-time.
Pedro Lopez received two yellow cards to be sent off before his side scored their second goal.
dkane@thenational.ae
COMPANY PROFILE
Name: HyperSpace
Started: 2020
Founders: Alexander Heller, Rama Allen and Desi Gonzalez
Based: Dubai, UAE
Sector: Entertainment
Number of staff: 210
Investment raised: $75 million from investors including Galaxy Interactive, Riyadh Season, Sega Ventures and Apis Venture Partners
Water waste
In the UAE’s arid climate, small shrubs, bushes and flower beds usually require about six litres of water per square metre, daily. That increases to 12 litres per square metre a day for small trees, and 300 litres for palm trees.
Horticulturists suggest the best time for watering is before 8am or after 6pm, when water won't be dried up by the sun.
A global report published by the Water Resources Institute in August, ranked the UAE 10th out of 164 nations where water supplies are most stretched.
The Emirates is the world’s third largest per capita water consumer after the US and Canada.
Citadel: Honey Bunny first episode
Directors: Raj & DK
Stars: Varun Dhawan, Samantha Ruth Prabhu, Kashvi Majmundar, Kay Kay Menon
Rating: 4/5
Disclaimer
Director: Alfonso Cuaron
Stars: Cate Blanchett, Kevin Kline, Lesley Manville
Rating: 4/5
Wicked
Director: Jon M Chu
Stars: Cynthia Erivo, Ariana Grande, Jonathan Bailey
The Written World: How Literature Shaped History
Martin Puchner
Granta
List of UAE medal winners
Gold
Faisal Al Ketbi (Open weight and 94kg)
Talib Al Kirbi (69kg)
Omar Al Fadhli (56kg)
Silver
Zayed Al Kaabi (94kg)
Khalfan Belhol (85kg)
Zayed Al Mansoori (62kg)
Mouza Al Shamsi (49kg women)
Bronze
Yahia Mansour Al Hammadi (Open and 94kg)
Saood Al Hammadi (77kg)
Said Al Mazroui (62kg)
Obaid Al Nuaimi (56kg)
Bashayer Al Matrooshi (62kg women)
Reem Abdulkareem (45kg women)
FFP EXPLAINED
What is Financial Fair Play?
Introduced in 2011 by Uefa, European football’s governing body, it demands that clubs live within their means. Chiefly, spend within their income and not make substantial losses.
What the rules dictate?
The second phase of its implementation limits losses to €30 million (Dh136m) over three seasons. Extra expenditure is permitted for investment in sustainable areas (youth academies, stadium development, etc). Money provided by owners is not viewed as income. Revenue from “related parties” to those owners is assessed by Uefa's “financial control body” to be sure it is a fair value, or in line with market prices.
What are the penalties?
There are a number of punishments, including fines, a loss of prize money or having to reduce squad size for European competition – as happened to PSG in 2014. There is even the threat of a competition ban, which could in theory lead to PSG’s suspension from the Uefa Champions League.
FFP EXPLAINED
What is Financial Fair Play?
Introduced in 2011 by Uefa, European football’s governing body, it demands that clubs live within their means. Chiefly, spend within their income and not make substantial losses.
What the rules dictate?
The second phase of its implementation limits losses to €30 million (Dh136m) over three seasons. Extra expenditure is permitted for investment in sustainable areas (youth academies, stadium development, etc). Money provided by owners is not viewed as income. Revenue from “related parties” to those owners is assessed by Uefa's “financial control body” to be sure it is a fair value, or in line with market prices.
What are the penalties?
There are a number of punishments, including fines, a loss of prize money or having to reduce squad size for European competition – as happened to PSG in 2014. There is even the threat of a competition ban, which could in theory lead to PSG’s suspension from the Uefa Champions League.
How to watch Ireland v Pakistan in UAE
When: The one-off Test starts on Friday, May 11
What time: Each day’s play is scheduled to start at 2pm UAE time.
TV: The match will be broadcast on OSN Sports Cricket HD. Subscribers to the channel can also stream the action live on OSN Play.
WHAT FANS WILL LOVE ABOUT RUSSIA
FANS WILL LOVE
Uber is ridiculously cheap and, as Diego Saez discovered, mush safer. A 45-minute taxi from Pulova airport to Saint Petersburg’s Nevsky Prospect can cost as little as 500 roubles (Dh30).
FANS WILL LOATHE
Uber policy in Russia is that they can start the fare as soon as they arrive at the pick-up point — and oftentimes they start it even before arriving, or worse never arrive yet charge you anyway.
FANS WILL LOVE
It’s amazing how active Russians are on social media and your accounts will surge should you post while in the country. Throw in a few Cyrillic hashtags and watch your account numbers rocket.
FANS WILL LOATHE
With cold soups, bland dumplings and dried fish, Russian cuisine is not to everybody’s tastebuds. Fortunately, there are plenty Georgian restaurants to choose from, which are both excellent and economical.
FANS WILL LOVE
The World Cup will take place during St Petersburg's White Nights Festival, which means perpetual daylight in a city that genuinely never sleeps. (Think toddlers walking the streets with their grandmothers at 4am.)
FANS WILL LOATHE
The walk from Krestovsky Ostrov metro station to Saint Petersburg Arena on a rainy day makes you wonder why some of the $1.7 billion was not spent on a weather-protected walkway.
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Company%20Profile
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