Ibn Battuta Mall is named after a famous explorer. Shoppers can relate to that because it's an expedition to get from one end of it to another.
Building very long malls is a speciality of Nakheel. It's other long mall is called Dragon Mart. Oddly, both are about 1 kilometre long - which is great for general fitness but not ideal for a quick shopping trip with young children.
So it was with some despair that I read the developer was planning to double the size of both. Please let them double the height and not the length.
And please let them not call the same architect who thinks carrying heavy shopping bags for a kilometre one way and then a kilometre the other with a couple of screaming children behind you is clever design.
It's only clever if you can afford to catch a ride in one of the tubby taxis they lay on.
These elongated golf buggies for the super-sized and idly affluent beep their way around the mall like they own the place.
We plebs instead need to apply complex mathematical algorithms to plot the optimum parking spot along the length of the mall so as to ensure the maximum shopping for the minimum mileage.
Somewhere in the middle near Debenhams is usually a safe bet.
Ibn Battuta would have started his journey from here if he had to visit Géant to the south to stock up before heading to Go Sports in the north to grab a pair of comfy water-resistant walking shoes, an absolute necessity for 29-year-long transcontinental treks.
It's easy to get carried away when you go shopping and buy stuff you don't really need.
Property developers can suffer from the same affliction.
When sales on the Palm Jumeirah were doing well almost a decade ago, Nakheel started to create two more palm-shaped islands before it had even nearly finished the first one. To do that, you need quite a lot of sand, about a quarter of the world's dredging fleet and several billion dollars in cash. You can see how that plan went if you ever fly into Dubai Airport during daylight.
Five years after the first tenants moved in, the Palm Jumeirah does not yet have a mall - or even a hypermarket.
A few months back, the developer decided that what the Palm and its tens of thousands of residents really needed was not a supermarket where they might perhaps purchase a pint of milk or the occasional loaf of bread - but some more houses.
Property developers are also easily encouraged by positive data. Retail is doing well just now and that is convincing developers to build more of it. But less than five years ago, offices were also doing well - so well that occupancy was running at 100 per cent- which made the city almost unique on the planet. As investors began to fear the beginnings of a residential property bubble in 2007, they began to look at different property asset classes. They noted that every square foot of prime office space in the city was occupied and they said to themselves: "We'll have some of that."
Overnight, semi-constructed residential skyscrapers were reconfigured into office buildings and sold by the floor. The little stands in malls displaying miniature models of apartment buildings were changed to advertise office buildings instead.
Nobody stopped to think how such buildings would ever be sold with a different landlord owning each floor. Or how potential tenants requiring more than one floor might have to negotiate with several different landlords - each offering different rents and lease terms. The plan was an utter disaster, and today almost half of the office stock in the emirate is empty.
This is what happens when property developers are left unattended without grown-up supervision for any length of time.
One minute you have crayon marks on the walls, the next they're driving piles into the patio.
I write this sitting in the Starbucks at the southernmost corner of Ibn Battuta Mall. Despite my moaning, I still like to visit on occasion - for the exercise mainly. The kids like the big elephant as well.
One of the sprogs is playing drums with the stirrers.
The other is lying on the floor doing the dying fly.
It's time to go home. But I've committed the schoolboy explorer error. The car is parked at the other end of the mall, which means having to endure a kilometre-long tantrum in Dolby surround sound. As another great explorer once said: I may be some time.
scronin@thenational.ae
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BULKWHIZ PROFILE
Date started: February 2017
Founders: Amira Rashad (CEO), Yusuf Saber (CTO), Mahmoud Sayedahmed (adviser), Reda Bouraoui (adviser)
Based: Dubai, UAE
Sector: E-commerce
Size: 50 employees
Funding: approximately $6m
Investors: Beco Capital, Enabling Future and Wain in the UAE; China's MSA Capital; 500 Startups; Faith Capital and Savour Ventures in Kuwait
Global Fungi Facts
• Scientists estimate there could be as many as 3 million fungal species globally
• Only about 160,000 have been officially described leaving around 90% undiscovered
• Fungi account for roughly 90% of Earth's unknown biodiversity
• Forest fungi help tackle climate change, absorbing up to 36% of global fossil fuel emissions annually and storing around 5 billion tonnes of carbon in the planet's topsoil
Pharaoh's curse
British aristocrat Lord Carnarvon, who funded the expedition to find the Tutankhamun tomb, died in a Cairo hotel four months after the crypt was opened.
He had been in poor health for many years after a car crash, and a mosquito bite made worse by a shaving cut led to blood poisoning and pneumonia.
Reports at the time said Lord Carnarvon suffered from “pain as the inflammation affected the nasal passages and eyes”.
Decades later, scientists contended he had died of aspergillosis after inhaling spores of the fungus aspergillus in the tomb, which can lie dormant for months. The fact several others who entered were also found dead withiin a short time led to the myth of the curse.
Key facilities
- Olympic-size swimming pool with a split bulkhead for multi-use configurations, including water polo and 50m/25m training lanes
- Premier League-standard football pitch
- 400m Olympic running track
- NBA-spec basketball court with auditorium
- 600-seat auditorium
- Spaces for historical and cultural exploration
- An elevated football field that doubles as a helipad
- Specialist robotics and science laboratories
- AR and VR-enabled learning centres
- Disruption Lab and Research Centre for developing entrepreneurial skills
F1 The Movie
Starring: Brad Pitt, Damson Idris, Kerry Condon, Javier Bardem
Director: Joseph Kosinski
Rating: 4/5
UAE currency: the story behind the money in your pockets
Moon Music
Artist: Coldplay
Label: Parlophone/Atlantic
Number of tracks: 10
Rating: 3/5
UAE currency: the story behind the money in your pockets
WIDE%20VIEW
%3Cp%3EThe%20benefits%20of%20HoloLens%202%2C%20according%20to%20Microsoft%3A%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EManufacturing%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20Reduces%20downtime%20and%20speeds%20up%20onboarding%20and%20upskilling%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EEngineering%20and%20construction%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20Accelerates%20the%20pace%20of%20construction%20and%20mitigates%20risks%20earlier%20in%20the%20construction%20cycle%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EHealth%20care%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20Enhances%20the%20delivery%20of%20patient%20treatment%20at%20the%20point%20of%20care%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EEducation%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20Improves%20student%20outcomes%20and%20teaches%20from%20anywhere%20with%20experiential%20learning%3C%2Fp%3E%0A
If you go
The flights
Emirates and Etihad fly direct to Nairobi, with fares starting from Dh1,695. The resort can be reached from Nairobi via a 35-minute flight from Wilson Airport or Jomo Kenyatta International Airport, or by road, which takes at least three hours.
The rooms
Rooms at Fairmont Mount Kenya range from Dh1,870 per night for a deluxe room to Dh11,000 per night for the William Holden Cottage.
Titan Sports Academy:
Programmes: Judo, wrestling, kick-boxing, muay thai, taekwondo and various summer camps
Location: Inside Abu Dhabi City Golf Club, Al Mushrif, Abu Dhabi, UAE
Telephone: 971 50 220 0326
The%20specs
%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EEngine%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%206.4-litre%20V8%0D%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3ETransmission%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3E8-speed%20auto%0D%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EPower%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3E470bhp%0D%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3ETorque%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3E637Nm%0D%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EPrice%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3EDh375%2C900%20(estimate)%0D%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EOn%20sale%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20now%3C%2Fp%3E%0A
Women%E2%80%99s%20Asia%20Cup
%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EUAE%20fixtures%3C%2Fstrong%3E%3Cbr%3ESun%20Oct%202%2C%20v%20Sri%20Lanka%3Cbr%3ETue%20Oct%204%2C%20v%20India%3Cbr%3EWed%20Oct%205%2C%20v%20Malaysia%3Cbr%3EFri%20Oct%207%2C%20v%20Thailand%3Cbr%3ESun%20Oct%209%2C%20v%20Pakistan%3Cbr%3ETue%20Oct%2011%2C%20v%20Bangladesh%3Cbr%3E%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EUAE%20squad%3C%2Fstrong%3E%3Cbr%3EChaya%20Mughal%20(captain)%2C%20Esha%20Oza%2C%20Kavisha%20Kumari%2C%20Khushi%20Sharma%2C%20Theertha%20Satish%2C%20Lavanya%20Keny%2C%20Priyanjali%20Jain%2C%20Suraksha%20Kotte%2C%20Natasha%20Cherriath%2C%20Indhuja%20Nandakumar%2C%20Rishitha%20Rajith%2C%20Vaishnave%20Mahesh%2C%20Siya%20Gokhale%2C%20Samaira%20Dharnidharka%2C%20Mahika%20Gaur%3C%2Fp%3E%0A
Our legal consultants
Name: Hassan Mohsen Elhais
Position: legal consultant with Al Rowaad Advocates and Legal Consultants.
ENGLAND TEAM
Alastair Cook, Mark Stoneman, James Vince, Joe Root (captain), Dawid Malan, Jonny Bairstow, Moeen Ali, Chris Woakes, Craig Overton, Stuart Broad, James Anderson
The most expensive investment mistake you will ever make
When is the best time to start saving in a pension? The answer is simple – at the earliest possible moment. The first pound, euro, dollar or dirham you invest is the most valuable, as it has so much longer to grow in value. If you start in your twenties, it could be invested for 40 years or more, which means you have decades for compound interest to work its magic.
“You get growth upon growth upon growth, followed by more growth. The earlier you start the process, the more it will all roll up,” says Chris Davies, chartered financial planner at The Fry Group in Dubai.
This table shows how much you would have in your pension at age 65, depending on when you start and how much you pay in (it assumes your investments grow 7 per cent a year after charges and you have no other savings).
|
Age
|
$250 a month
|
$500 a month
|
$1,000 a month
|
|
25
|
$640,829
|
$1,281,657
|
$2,563,315
|
|
35
|
$303,219
|
$606,439
|
$1,212,877
|
|
45
|
$131,596
|
$263,191
|
$526,382
|
|
55
|
$44,351
|
$88,702
|
$177,403
|
Ready Player One
Dir: Steven Spielberg
Starring: Tye Sheridan, Olivia Cooke, Ben Mendelsohn, Mark Rylance
PSL FINAL
Multan Sultans v Peshawar Zalmi
8pm, Thursday
Zayed Cricket Stadium, Abu Dhabi
Fast%20X
%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EDirector%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20Louis%20Leterrier%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EStars%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20Vin%20Diesel%2C%20Michelle%20Rodriguez%2C%20Jason%20Statham%2C%20Tyrese%20Gibson%2C%20Ludacris%2C%20Jason%20Momoa%2C%20John%20Cena%2C%20Jordana%20Brewster%2C%20Nathalie%20Emmanuel%2C%20Sung%20Kang%2C%20Brie%20Larson%2C%20Helen%20Mirren%20and%20Charlize%20Theron%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3ERating%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%203%2F5%3C%2Fp%3E%0A
What is graphene?
Graphene is extracted from graphite and is made up of pure carbon.
It is 200 times more resistant than steel and five times lighter than aluminum.
It conducts electricity better than any other material at room temperature.
It is thought that graphene could boost the useful life of batteries by 10 per cent.
Graphene can also detect cancer cells in the early stages of the disease.
The material was first discovered when Andre Geim and Konstantin Novoselov were 'playing' with graphite at the University of Manchester in 2004.
MATCH INFO
FA Cup fifth round
Chelsea v Manchester United, Monday, 11.30pm (UAE), BeIN Sports
What%20is%20cystic%20fibrosis%3F
%3Cul%3E%0A%3Cli%3ECystic%20fibrosis%20is%20a%20genetic%20disorder%20that%20affects%20the%20lungs%2C%20pancreas%20and%20other%20organs.%3C%2Fli%3E%0A%3Cli%3EIt%20causes%20the%20production%20of%20thick%2C%20sticky%20mucus%20that%20can%20clog%20the%20airways%20and%20lead%20to%20severe%20respiratory%20and%20digestive%20problems.%3C%2Fli%3E%0A%3Cli%3EPatients%20with%20the%20condition%20are%20prone%20to%20lung%20infections%20and%20often%20suffer%20from%20chronic%20coughing%2C%20wheezing%20and%20shortness%20of%20breath.%3C%2Fli%3E%0A%3Cli%3ELife%20expectancy%20for%20sufferers%20of%20cystic%20fibrosis%20is%20now%20around%2050%20years.%3C%2Fli%3E%0A%3C%2Ful%3E%0A
The finalists
Player of the Century, 2001-2020: Cristiano Ronaldo (Juventus), Lionel Messi (Barcelona), Mohamed Salah (Liverpool), Ronaldinho
Coach of the Century, 2001-2020: Pep Guardiola (Manchester City), Jose Mourinho (Tottenham Hotspur), Zinedine Zidane (Real Madrid), Sir Alex Ferguson
Club of the Century, 2001-2020: Al Ahly (Egypt), Bayern Munich (Germany), Barcelona (Spain), Real Madrid (Spain)
Player of the Year: Cristiano Ronaldo, Lionel Messi, Robert Lewandowski (Bayern Munich)
Club of the Year: Bayern Munich, Liverpool, Real Madrid
Coach of the Year: Gian Piero Gasperini (Atalanta), Hans-Dieter Flick (Bayern Munich), Jurgen Klopp (Liverpool)
Agent of the Century, 2001-2020: Giovanni Branchini, Jorge Mendes, Mino Raiola
Teams
Punjabi Legends Owners: Inzamam-ul-Haq and Intizar-ul-Haq; Key player: Misbah-ul-Haq
Pakhtoons Owners: Habib Khan and Tajuddin Khan; Key player: Shahid Afridi
Maratha Arabians Owners: Sohail Khan, Ali Tumbi, Parvez Khan; Key player: Virender Sehwag
Bangla Tigers Owners: Shirajuddin Alam, Yasin Choudhary, Neelesh Bhatnager, Anis and Rizwan Sajan; Key player: TBC
Colombo Lions Owners: Sri Lanka Cricket; Key player: TBC
Kerala Kings Owners: Hussain Adam Ali and Shafi Ul Mulk; Key player: Eoin Morgan
Venue Sharjah Cricket Stadium
Format 10 overs per side, matches last for 90 minutes
Timeline October 25: Around 120 players to be entered into a draft, to be held in Dubai; December 21: Matches start; December 24: Finals
ENGLAND SQUAD
Goalkeepers: Jack Butland, Jordan Pickford, Nick Pope
Defenders: John Stones, Harry Maguire, Phil Jones, Kyle Walker, Kieran Trippier, Gary Cahill, Ashley Young, Danny Rose, Trent Alexander-Arnold
Midfielders: Eric Dier, Jordan Henderson, Dele Alli, Jesse Lingard, Raheem Sterling, Ruben Loftus-Cheek, Fabian Delph
Forwards: Harry Kane, Jamie Vardy, Marcus Rashford, Danny Welbeck
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Honeymoonish
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UAE currency: the story behind the money in your pockets
Bob%20Marley%3A%20One%20Love
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UAE SQUAD
Khalid Essa, Ali Khaseif, Fahad Al Dhanhani, Adel Al Hosani, Bandar Al Ahbabi, Mohammad Barghash, Salem Rashid, Khalifa Al Hammadi, Shaheen Abdulrahman, Hassan Al Mahrami, Walid Abbas, Mahmoud Khamis, Yousef Jaber, Majed Sorour, Majed Hassan, Ali Salmeen, Abdullah Ramadan, Abdullah Al Naqbi, Khalil Al Hammadi, Fabio De Lima, Khalfan Mubarak, Tahnoon Al Zaabi, Ali Saleh, Caio Canedo, Ali Mabkhout, Sebastian Tagliabue, Zayed Al Ameri
