Arguments about money can create considerable conflict between couples, according to financial experts.
Problems relating to financial matters are a major reason why marriages break down, the American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers says in its Making Marriage Last booklet.
“Whether it is over how money is earned, spent or saved, money fights are common because money is a part of daily life, from paying the electric bill to saving for retirement,” it says.
“Attitudes towards money are learnt in childhood. When spouses are raised with widely differing attitudes towards money, conflict is inevitable.
“The key is for couples to discuss their views on money and to decide among themselves how they will make decisions about how the family money will be controlled.”
About 62 per cent of spouses who argue with their partner do so because they disagree over money, according to a 2022 survey of 2,000 UK adults by investment provider Royal London.
The most common cause of these arguments is “spending too much”, the research found.
Twenty-four per cent of respondents to the survey also consider their partner to be irresponsible with money, it said.
Financial compatibility is a critical aspect of marriage, says Sophia Bhatti, director of Dubai-based Wimbledon Wealth.
If you don’t have a partner who understands your financial goals and is willing to help you reach them, it is going to be much harder to build the life you want, she says.
We asked finance experts to list eight crucial money questions couples should ask each other to know if they are financially compatible.
1. Can we speak to each other comfortably about finances?
When living together, it is wise to work out a joint budget to at least ensure that monthly bills and expenses are paid, says Rupert Connor, partner at Abacus Financial Services.
“Depending on how long the relationship has been going, there might also be joint savings goals or an existing joint mortgage or retirement account,” he says.
“However, no matter what stage the relationship is at, if one’s financial future is tied together, then it is worth talking about it.”
About 33 per cent of adults surveyed by Royal London said they keep financial secrets from their partner, including hiding their savings and having undisclosed debts, while 76 per cent keep some or all of their banking separate from their spouse.
Money discussions between couples can be very heated, says Rasheda Khan, a financial wellness expert and founder of Dubai-based wealth management consultancy Design Your Life.
Before sitting down to talk, remind each other that you are on the same side and discussing money matters means you are both able to move closer to your financial goals, she says.
About 70 per cent of couples in the US discuss finances on a weekly basis and 32 per cent talk about it a few times a week, according to a 2022 survey of 1,000 adults by media and technology company The Knot.
When it comes to talking about money, 76 per cent of couples polled find it “very or somewhat easy” to discuss money and finances with their partner, the survey found.
However, 10 per cent said it was “somewhat or very difficult” to talk about money. Words and phrases used to describe reasons for the difficulty include “awkwardness”, “different values” and “poor communication”.
No matter what stage the relationship is at, if one’s financial future is tied together, then it is worth talking about it
Rupert Connor,
partner at Abacus Financial Services
2. Do you find it easier to spend or save?
While couples may know the answer to this or have an opinion, it is good to have an open conversation about spending and saving to ensure you are on the same page, Ms Khan says.
“Saving is important, so one person has to take responsibility of watching over it. If you are the one who saves first, then you take responsibility.
“This will also help you decide who takes responsibility for other expenses. Taking responsibility means ensuring this bill or expense gets paid; it is not about who earns what.”
About 33 per cent of couples surveyed by Royal London said they are incompatible with their partner when it comes to spending and saving.
One partner may care more about saving for their retirement, while the other places more emphasis on saving for an emergency fund, says Mr Connor.
Try to learn more about each other’s definitions for what being good with money actually means, he says.
3. How honest are you about debt?
Many people do not tell their partner about debts they may have, according to experts.
This could be an attempt to protect a partner. However, it is much easier for things to get out of hand if you hide problems, Mr Connor says.
About 32 per cent of Americans are keeping a financial secret from their partner, according to a 2022 survey by TD Bank.
The most common financial secrets are a big purchase, significant credit card debt and a hidden bank account.
“One school of thought believes that we should not be borrowing short term, as our savings can always cover our expenses. Another is that short-term borrowing is part of every day life and nothing to worry about,” Mr Connor says.
“If partners have different views on this, it does not have to be a problem, so long as some sort of compromise is established and both partners stick to their side of the bargain.”
4. What expenses should I be responsible for?
Divide the expenses and decide who is managing which expense and let them take responsibility for it, Ms Khan says.
“It should no longer be about are you good or not, rather it is about working together to get closer to your goals,” she says.
5. What are your spending priorities?
Spending habits can often affect couples, even if they keep separate accounts, as money will be required to accomplish joint financial goals, says Mr Connor.
Agree on how much to spend and save, so that money fights become far less frequent, he says.
However, if one is a spender and the other a saver, a compromise must be found that works for both partners, he says.
6. What lifestyle do you want to live now and in the future?
Understanding each other’s needs and wants helps you to budget for them within your monthly expenses, Ms Khan says.
Divide the expenses and decide who is managing which expense and let them take responsibility for it
Rasheda Khatun Khan,
founder of Design Your Life
It also helps couples to be on the same page in terms of how they want life to be, she says.
“Consider what lifestyle you can live now and what you both are working towards.”
7. What keeps you up at night about finances?
It is not unusual to be anxious about your financial situation, according to Mr Connor.
“Sharing these stresses and concerns is a good way to get them off one’s chest,” he says.
8. Do we need a prenuptial agreement?
The idea of signing a prenuptial agreement before marriage may seem unromantic but it is a sensible way of starting out, Mr Connor says.
“Taking the time to agree with your partner what should happen to assets in the event your marriage fails will reduce uncertainty and stress in your relationship and, should the worst happen, a prenuptial agreement can be an invaluable resource to fall back on in divorce negotiations,” he says.
“Where there is disparity in wealth between partners or inheritance is due … this type of agreement is recommended.”
Among US adults who have been married or are currently engaged, 15 per cent said that they had signed a prenup, up from 3 per cent in 2010, according to a 2022 survey of 1,073 people by The Harris Poll.
Forty-two per cent of US adults support prenups and 35 per cent of those who are unmarried said that they will probably sign one in the future, the survey found.
Defence review at a glance
• Increase defence spending to 2.5% of GDP by 2027 but given “turbulent times it may be necessary to go faster”
• Prioritise a shift towards working with AI and autonomous systems
• Invest in the resilience of military space systems.
• Number of active reserves should be increased by 20%
• More F-35 fighter jets required in the next decade
• New “hybrid Navy” with AUKUS submarines and autonomous vessels
More from Neighbourhood Watch:
Killing of Qassem Suleimani
KILLING OF QASSEM SULEIMANI
THE SPECS
Engine: 2.0-litre four-cylinder turbo
Transmission: eight-speed automatic
Power: 258hp at 5,000-6,500rpm
Torque: 400Nm from 1,550-4,400rpm
Fuel economy, combined: 6.4L/100km
Price, base: from D215,000 (Dh230,000 as tested)
On sale: now
More from Neighbourhood Watch:
How to wear a kandura
Dos
- Wear the right fabric for the right season and occasion
- Always ask for the dress code if you don’t know
- Wear a white kandura, white ghutra / shemagh (headwear) and black shoes for work
- Wear 100 per cent cotton under the kandura as most fabrics are polyester
Don’ts
- Wear hamdania for work, always wear a ghutra and agal
- Buy a kandura only based on how it feels; ask questions about the fabric and understand what you are buying
BMW M5 specs
Engine: 4.4-litre twin-turbo V-8 petrol enging with additional electric motor
Power: 727hp
Torque: 1,000Nm
Transmission: 8-speed auto
Fuel consumption: 10.6L/100km
On sale: Now
Price: From Dh650,000
More from Neighbourhood Watch:
Moon Music
Artist: Coldplay
Label: Parlophone/Atlantic
Number of tracks: 10
Rating: 3/5
Killing of Qassem Suleimani
The specs
Engine: Two permanent-magnet synchronous AC motors
Transmission: two-speed
Power: 671hp
Torque: 849Nm
Range: 456km
Price: from Dh437,900
On sale: now
Killing of Qassem Suleimani
Mohammed bin Zayed Majlis
Company profile
Name: Back to Games and Boardgame Space
Started: Back to Games (2015); Boardgame Space (Mark Azzam became co-founder in 2017)
Founder: Back to Games (Mr Azzam); Boardgame Space (Mr Azzam and Feras Al Bastaki)
Based: Dubai and Abu Dhabi
Industry: Back to Games (retail); Boardgame Space (wholesale and distribution)
Funding: Back to Games: self-funded by Mr Azzam with Dh1.3 million; Mr Azzam invested Dh250,000 in Boardgame Space
Growth: Back to Games: from 300 products in 2015 to 7,000 in 2019; Boardgame Space: from 34 games in 2017 to 3,500 in 2019
THE DEALS
Hamilton $60m x 2 = $120m
Vettel $45m x 2 = $90m
Ricciardo $35m x 2 = $70m
Verstappen $55m x 3 = $165m
Leclerc $20m x 2 = $40m
TOTAL $485m
More from Neighbourhood Watch
More from Rashmee Roshan Lall
%20Ramez%20Gab%20Min%20El%20Akher
%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3ECreator%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20Ramez%20Galal%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EStarring%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20Ramez%20Galal%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EStreaming%20on%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3EMBC%20Shahid%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3ERating%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3E2.5%2F5%3C%2Fp%3E%0A
Teri%20Baaton%20Mein%20Aisa%20Uljha%20Jiya
%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EDirectors%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20Amit%20Joshi%20and%20Aradhana%20Sah%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3ECast%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20Shahid%20Kapoor%2C%20Kriti%20Sanon%2C%20Dharmendra%2C%20Dimple%20Kapadia%2C%20Rakesh%20Bedi%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3ERating%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%204%2F5%3C%2Fp%3E%0A
The years Ramadan fell in May
More on animal trafficking
MOUNTAINHEAD REVIEW
Starring: Ramy Youssef, Steve Carell, Jason Schwartzman
Director: Jesse Armstrong
Rating: 3.5/5
WHAT IS A BLACK HOLE?
1. Black holes are objects whose gravity is so strong not even light can escape their pull
2. They can be created when massive stars collapse under their own weight
3. Large black holes can also be formed when smaller ones collide and merge
4. The biggest black holes lurk at the centre of many galaxies, including our own
5. Astronomers believe that when the universe was very young, black holes affected how galaxies formed
box
COMPANY PROFILE
Company name: Letstango.com
Started: June 2013
Founder: Alex Tchablakian
Based: Dubai
Industry: e-commerce
Initial investment: Dh10 million
Investors: Self-funded
Total customers: 300,000 unique customers every month
The specs: 2018 Volkswagen Teramont
Price, base / as tested Dh137,000 / Dh189,950
Engine 3.6-litre V6
Gearbox Eight-speed automatic
Power 280hp @ 6,200rpm
Torque 360Nm @ 2,750rpm
Fuel economy, combined 11.7L / 100km
The%20specs
%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EEngine%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%201.8-litre%204-cyl%20turbo%0D%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EPower%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3E190hp%20at%205%2C200rpm%0D%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3ETorque%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20320Nm%20from%201%2C800-5%2C000rpm%0D%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3ETransmission%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3ESeven-speed%20dual-clutch%20auto%0D%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EFuel%20consumption%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%206.7L%2F100km%0D%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EPrice%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20From%20Dh111%2C195%0D%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EOn%20sale%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3ENow%3C%2Fp%3E%0A
The drill
Recharge as needed, says Mat Dryden: “We try to make it a rule that every two to three months, even if it’s for four days, we get away, get some time together, recharge, refresh.” The couple take an hour a day to check into their businesses and that’s it.
Stick to the schedule, says Mike Addo: “We have an entire wall known as ‘The Lab,’ covered with colour-coded Post-it notes dedicated to our joint weekly planner, content board, marketing strategy, trends, ideas and upcoming meetings.”
Be a team, suggests Addo: “When training together, you have to trust in each other’s abilities. Otherwise working out together very quickly becomes one person training the other.”
Pull your weight, says Thuymi Do: “To do what we do, there definitely can be no lazy member of the team.”
Neymar's bio
Total club appearances 411
Total goals scored 241
Appearances for Barca 186
Goals scored for Barca 105
The years Ramadan fell in May
Dust and sand storms compared
Sand storm
- Particle size: Larger, heavier sand grains
- Visibility: Often dramatic with thick "walls" of sand
- Duration: Short-lived, typically localised
- Travel distance: Limited
- Source: Open desert areas with strong winds
Dust storm
- Particle size: Much finer, lightweight particles
- Visibility: Hazy skies but less intense
- Duration: Can linger for days
- Travel distance: Long-range, up to thousands of kilometres
- Source: Can be carried from distant regions
The specs: 2018 Mercedes-Benz E 300 Cabriolet
Price, base / as tested: Dh275,250 / Dh328,465
Engine: 2.0-litre four-cylinder
Power: 245hp @ 5,500rpm
Torque: 370Nm @ 1,300rpm
Transmission: Nine-speed automatic
Fuel consumption, combined: 7.0L / 100km
VEZEETA PROFILE
Date started: 2012
Founder: Amir Barsoum
Based: Dubai, UAE
Sector: HealthTech / MedTech
Size: 300 employees
Funding: $22.6 million (as of September 2018)
Investors: Technology Development Fund, Silicon Badia, Beco Capital, Vostok New Ventures, Endeavour Catalyst, Crescent Enterprises’ CE-Ventures, Saudi Technology Ventures and IFC
The specs: 2018 Chevrolet Trailblazer
Price, base / as tested Dh99,000 / Dh132,000
Engine 3.6L V6
Transmission: Six-speed automatic
Power 275hp @ 6,000rpm
Torque 350Nm @ 3,700rpm
Fuel economy combined 12.2L / 100km
Primera Liga fixtures (all times UAE: 4 GMT)
Friday
Real Sociedad v Villarreal (10.15pm)
Real Betis v Celta Vigo (midnight)
Saturday
Alaves v Barcelona (8.15pm)
Levante v Deportivo La Coruna (10.15pm)
Girona v Malaga (10.15pm)
Las Palmas v Atletico Madrid (12.15am)
Sunday
Espanyol v Leganes (8.15pm)
Eibar v Athletic Bilbao (8.15pm)
Getafe v Sevilla (10.15pm)
Real Madrid v Valencia (10.15pm)
The burning issue
The internal combustion engine is facing a watershed moment – major manufacturer Volvo is to stop producing petroleum-powered vehicles by 2021 and countries in Europe, including the UK, have vowed to ban their sale before 2040. The National takes a look at the story of one of the most successful technologies of the last 100 years and how it has impacted life in the UAE.
Read part four: an affection for classic cars lives on
Read part three: the age of the electric vehicle begins
Read part one: how cars came to the UAE
The White Lotus: Season three
Creator: Mike White
Starring: Walton Goggins, Jason Isaacs, Natasha Rothwell
Rating: 4.5/5
Company%20profile
%3Cp%3ECompany%20name%3A%20Shipsy%3Cbr%3EYear%20of%20inception%3A%202015%3Cbr%3EFounders%3A%20Soham%20Chokshi%2C%20Dhruv%20Agrawal%2C%20Harsh%20Kumar%20and%20Himanshu%20Gupta%3Cbr%3EBased%3A%20India%2C%20UAE%20and%20Indonesia%3Cbr%3ESector%3A%20logistics%3Cbr%3ESize%3A%20more%20than%20350%20employees%3Cbr%3EFunding%20received%20so%20far%3A%20%2431%20million%20in%20series%20A%20and%20B%20rounds%3Cbr%3EInvestors%3A%20Info%20Edge%2C%20Sequoia%20Capital%E2%80%99s%20Surge%2C%20A91%20Partners%20and%20Z3%20Partners%3C%2Fp%3E%0A
TECH%20SPECS%3A%20APPLE%20WATCH%20SE%20(second%20generation)
%3Cp%3EDisplay%3A%2040mm%2C%20324%20x%20394%3B%2044mm%2C%20368%20x%20448%3B%20Retina%20LTPO%20OLED%2C%20up%20to%201000%20nits%3B%20Ion-X%20glass%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3EProcessor%3A%20Apple%20S8%2C%20W3%20wireless%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3ECapacity%3A%2032GB%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3EMemory%3A%201GB%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3EPlatform%3A%20watchOS%209%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3EHealth%20metrics%3A%202nd-gen%20heart%20rate%20sensor%2C%20workouts%2C%20fall%2Fcrash%20detection%3B%20emergency%20SOS%2C%20international%20emergency%20calling%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3EConnectivity%3A%20GPS%2FGPS%20%2B%20cellular%3B%20Wi-Fi%2C%20LTE%2C%20Bluetooth%205.3%2C%20NFC%20(Apple%20Pay)%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3EDurability%3A%20Water%20resistant%20up%20to%2050m%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3EBattery%3A%20269mAh%20Li-ion%2C%20up%20to%2018h%2C%20wireless%20charging%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3ECards%3A%20eSIM%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3EFinishes%3A%20Aluminium%3B%20midnight%2C%20silver%2C%20starlight%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3EIn%20the%20box%3A%20Watch%20SE%2C%20magnetic-to-USB-C%20charging%20cable%2C%20band%2Floop%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3EPrice%3A%20Starts%20at%20Dh999%20(40mm)%20%2F%201%2C119%20(44mm)%3C%2Fp%3E%0A
MATCH INFO
Uefa Champions League, last 16, first leg
Liverpool v Bayern Munich, midnight (Wednesday), BeIN Sports
Match info:
Burnley 0
Manchester United 2
Lukaku (22', 44')
Red card: Marcus Rashford (Man United)
Man of the match: Romelu Lukaku (Manchester United)
Players Selected for La Liga Trials
U18 Age Group
Name: Ahmed Salam (Malaga)
Position: Right Wing
Nationality: Jordanian
Name: Yahia Iraqi (Malaga)
Position: Left Wing
Nationality: Morocco
Name: Mohammed Bouherrafa (Almeria)
Position: Centre-Midfield
Nationality: French
Name: Mohammed Rajeh (Cadiz)
Position: Striker
Nationality: Jordanian
U16 Age Group
Name: Mehdi Elkhamlichi (Malaga)
Position: Lead Striker
Nationality: Morocco
1,000 Books to Read Before You Die: A Life-Changing List
James Mustich, Workman
Specs
Engine: Electric motor generating 54.2kWh (Cooper SE and Aceman SE), 64.6kW (Countryman All4 SE)
Power: 218hp (Cooper and Aceman), 313hp (Countryman)
Torque: 330Nm (Cooper and Aceman), 494Nm (Countryman)
On sale: Now
Price: From Dh158,000 (Cooper), Dh168,000 (Aceman), Dh190,000 (Countryman)