Wedad Lootah, seated behind her desk, talks to a woman in her office in the Dubai Courts.
Wedad Lootah, seated behind her desk, talks to a woman in her office in the Dubai Courts.
Wedad Lootah, seated behind her desk, talks to a woman in her office in the Dubai Courts.
Wedad Lootah, seated behind her desk, talks to a woman in her office in the Dubai Courts.

Marriage advice by the book


  • English
  • Arabic

There is no irony in the fact that Wedad Lootah has been fighting for women's sexual rights from behind full niqab. A marriage counsellor in the family guidance department at Dubai Courts, Ms Lootah bases her advice firmly on the teachings of the Quran.

And her goals are much less about sexual liberation than they are about helping married couples avoid divorce. "My subject is not sex; people always misunderstand that," she explains. "I'm trying to guide people about how to satisfy each other and save society from illegal relationships - girlfriends, boyfriends. We're talking about Islam. We're not talking about sex." The reality is that she and the individuals and couples she meets do talk about sex.

But they do so within the parameters of marriage counselling, guided by the rules and principles dictated in the Quran. If the Quran did not figure so largely in her work, she would probably not have been personally appointed by Sheikh Mohammed bin Rashid, Vice President of the UAE and Ruler of Dubai, as the first and only female family counsellor at the courts; and it is very unlikely that her recent book, Top Secret: Sexual Guidance for Married Couples, would have been published in this country.

After all, subjects discussed within its pages range from the female orgasm to the importance of communication within a marriage. According to Islamic tradition, Ms Lootah explains, marriage is a three-step process. It begins with the selection of the two people who will potentially marry. If the families agree on the union, it is confirmed legally by signing a written agreement. "Then the marriage is legal, but it is without sex. That's not until the wedding," she says.

"The Prophet Mohammed, peace be upon him, said before you marry, you need to see each other, you need to understand if you like each other. "I advise people to visit each other before the wedding, spend time together, get to know each other." Ms Lootah sees herself as neither provocative nor revolutionary; her book, an extension of her work, is meant only to help maintain the strength of the traditions of her country and culture. Nothing she advocates or condemns diverges from the Quran; which is why she was able to have an imam give her book his blessing long before it was published.

"Sex is a big part of marriage. Mostly it's women who come in to see me. And they're here because the men don't always understand that they have responsibility in the marriage beyond working: they have a responsibility to make sure the wife gets pleasure. And if he has two or more wives, it has to be equal among them all." Ebullient and congenial, Ms Lootah is well aware that being able to do what she does, where she does it, makes her the exception rather than the rule.

But her openness about a topic sometimes considered taboo within Islamic culture has not been universally well received. Death threats and accusations of blasphemy followed the January release of her book. Most of the recent onslaught originated in the Gulf, she says. Ms Lootah's experience with threats and opposition began in 2004 after an interview on Al Arabiya television; their numbers have grown since then in tandem with her popularity and success.

In her mind, though, the ever unflappable Ms Lootah believes what she is doing is right and important. The idea of the book came to her in 2006 after a series of meetings with women whose stories about marital relations shocked her. The more stories she heard, the more convinced she was that she needed to begin research and get a book together for distribution in the UAE. "One couple lived together for 35 years, they had children, and in discussion I found that the woman had had no sexual pleasure in all that time," she says.

Clearly, Ms Lootah says, there is a demand for the kind of service she provides. And as sex is so little discussed, often people's questions go unasked and unanswered. "This is important because sex is an important part of marriage, that's in the Quran," she says. "But not everyone I see is Muslim. I see all religions, all nationalities. But mostly women." The number of people she sees has increased steadily over the nine years she has worked as a counsellor. Now she has about five or six appointments a day.

"From 2001 to 2004 it was almost always on the phone; couples were ashamed to talk, or they would talk but they wouldn't reveal everything," she says. "Since 2004, when I went on Al Arabiya and started giving lectures, and then the book, now people know there is someone who will listen. Even the most religious couples tell me everything now." Born and raised in Dubai, Ms Lootah has been married for 21 years and has three children.

Her marriage is strong, she says, and her husband is "very supportive, very proud" of her. Some of her best moments are when people she has counselled come back and thank her for saving a marriage that at one point seemed doomed. In addition to a lack of communication, Ms Lootah says, lack of variety or too much routine can hurt a marriage because the spark begins to fade. Other than getting to know each other as much as possible before marrying, her advice is relatively simple and straightforward.

"My advice for married women is to buy lots of dresses. Look beautiful. Be clean. Use the perfume. "I give the same advice to men: be like what you want your wife to be like. Brush your teeth." Above all, she says, when it comes to the bedroom, couples should remember variety is the spice of life. jhume@thenational.ae

Avatar: Fire and Ash

Director: James Cameron

Starring: Sam Worthington, Sigourney Weaver, Zoe Saldana

Rating: 4.5/5

ICC T20 Rankings

1. India - 270 ranking points

 

2. England - 265 points

 

3. Pakistan - 261 points

 

4. South Africa - 253 points

 

5. Australia - 251 points 

 

6. New Zealand - 250 points

 

7. West Indies - 240 points

 

8. Bangladesh - 233 points

 

9. Sri Lanka - 230 points

 

10. Afghanistan - 226 points

 

Favourite book: ‘The Art of Learning’ by Josh Waitzkin

Favourite film: Marvel movies

Favourite parkour spot in Dubai: Residence towers in Jumeirah Beach Residence

COMPANY%20PROFILE
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Should late investors consider cryptocurrencies?

Wealth managers recommend late investors to have a balanced portfolio that typically includes traditional assets such as cash, government and corporate bonds, equities, commodities and commercial property.

They do not usually recommend investing in Bitcoin or other cryptocurrencies due to the risk and volatility associated with them.

“It has produced eye-watering returns for some, whereas others have lost substantially as this has all depended purely on timing and when the buy-in was. If someone still has about 20 to 25 years until retirement, there isn’t any need to take such risks,” Rupert Connor of Abacus Financial Consultant says.

He adds that if a person is interested in owning a business or growing a property portfolio to increase their retirement income, this can be encouraged provided they keep in mind the overall risk profile of these assets.

Dengue%20fever%20symptoms
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Other acts on the Jazz Garden bill

Sharrie Williams
The American singer is hugely respected in blues circles due to her passionate vocals and songwriting. Born and raised in Michigan, Williams began recording and touring as a teenage gospel singer. Her career took off with the blues band The Wiseguys. Such was the acclaim of their live shows that they toured throughout Europe and in Africa. As a solo artist, Williams has also collaborated with the likes of the late Dizzy Gillespie, Van Morrison and Mavis Staples.
Lin Rountree
An accomplished smooth jazz artist who blends his chilled approach with R‘n’B. Trained at the Duke Ellington School of the Arts in Washington, DC, Rountree formed his own band in 2004. He has also recorded with the likes of Kem, Dwele and Conya Doss. He comes to Dubai on the back of his new single Pass The Groove, from his forthcoming 2018 album Stronger Still, which may follow his five previous solo albums in cracking the top 10 of the US jazz charts.
Anita Williams
Dubai-based singer Anita Williams will open the night with a set of covers and swing, jazz and blues standards that made her an in-demand singer across the emirate. The Irish singer has been performing in Dubai since 2008 at venues such as MusicHall and Voda Bar. Her Jazz Garden appearance is career highlight as she will use the event to perform the original song Big Blue Eyes, the single from her debut solo album, due for release soon.

The bio

Favourite book: The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho

Favourite travel destination: Maldives and south of France

Favourite pastime: Family and friends, meditation, discovering new cuisines

Favourite Movie: Joker (2019). I didn’t like it while I was watching it but then afterwards I loved it. I loved the psychology behind it.

Favourite Author: My father for sure

Favourite Artist: Damien Hurst

The specs: 2018 Ducati SuperSport S

Price, base / as tested: Dh74,900 / Dh85,900

Engine: 937cc

Transmission: Six-speed gearbox

Power: 110hp @ 9,000rpm

Torque: 93Nm @ 6,500rpm

Fuel economy, combined: 5.9L / 100km

Ten tax points to be aware of in 2026

1. Domestic VAT refund amendments: request your refund within five years

If a business does not apply for the refund on time, they lose their credit.

2. E-invoicing in the UAE

Businesses should continue preparing for the implementation of e-invoicing in the UAE, with 2026 a preparation and transition period ahead of phased mandatory adoption. 

3. More tax audits

Tax authorities are increasingly using data already available across multiple filings to identify audit risks. 

4. More beneficial VAT and excise tax penalty regime

Tax disputes are expected to become more frequent and more structured, with clearer administrative objection and appeal processes. The UAE has adopted a new penalty regime for VAT and excise disputes, which now mirrors the penalty regime for corporate tax.

5. Greater emphasis on statutory audit

There is a greater need for the accuracy of financial statements. The International Financial Reporting Standards standards need to be strictly adhered to and, as a result, the quality of the audits will need to increase.

6. Further transfer pricing enforcement

Transfer pricing enforcement, which refers to the practice of establishing prices for internal transactions between related entities, is expected to broaden in scope. The UAE will shortly open the possibility to negotiate advance pricing agreements, or essentially rulings for transfer pricing purposes. 

7. Limited time periods for audits

Recent amendments also introduce a default five-year limitation period for tax audits and assessments, subject to specific statutory exceptions. While the standard audit and assessment period is five years, this may be extended to up to 15 years in cases involving fraud or tax evasion. 

8. Pillar 2 implementation 

Many multinational groups will begin to feel the practical effect of the Domestic Minimum Top-Up Tax (DMTT), the UAE's implementation of the OECD’s global minimum tax under Pillar 2. While the rules apply for financial years starting on or after January 1, 2025, it is 2026 that marks the transition to an operational phase.

9. Reduced compliance obligations for imported goods and services

Businesses that apply the reverse-charge mechanism for VAT purposes in the UAE may benefit from reduced compliance obligations. 

10. Substance and CbC reporting focus

Tax authorities are expected to continue strengthening the enforcement of economic substance and Country-by-Country (CbC) reporting frameworks. In the UAE, these regimes are increasingly being used as risk-assessment tools, providing tax authorities with a comprehensive view of multinational groups’ global footprints and enabling them to assess whether profits are aligned with real economic activity. 

Contributed by Thomas Vanhee and Hend Rashwan, Aurifer

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Empty Words

By Mario Levrero  

(Coffee House Press)
 

Company%20profile
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How it works

Each player begins with one of the great empires of history, from Julius Caesar's Rome to Ramses of Egypt, spread over Europe and the Middle East.

Round by round, the player expands their empire. The more land they have, the more money they can take from their coffers for each go.

As unruled land and soldiers are acquired, players must feed them. When a player comes up against land held by another army, they can choose to battle for supremacy.

A dice-based battle system is used and players can get the edge on their enemy with by deploying a renowned hero on the battlefield.

Players that lose battles and land will find their coffers dwindle and troops go hungry. The end goal? Global domination of course.

Dubai Bling season three

Cast: Loujain Adada, Zeina Khoury, Farhana Bodi, Ebraheem Al Samadi, Mona Kattan, and couples Safa & Fahad Siddiqui and DJ Bliss & Danya Mohammed 

Rating: 1/5

Five%20calorie-packed%20Ramadan%20drinks
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Jawan
%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EDirector%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3EAtlee%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EStars%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20Shah%20Rukh%20Khan%2C%20Nayanthara%2C%20Vijay%20Sethupathi%26nbsp%3B%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3ERating%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3E4%2F5%3C%2Fp%3E%0A
SNAPSHOT

While Huawei did launch the first smartphone with a 50MP image sensor in its P40 series in 2020, Oppo in 2014 introduced the Find 7, which was capable of taking 50MP images: this was done using a combination of a 13MP sensor and software that resulted in shots seemingly taken from a 50MP camera.